S4E16: Dyslexia - Understanding the Challenges

In this conversation, Brent Sopel and Juliet Hahn delve into the challenges faced by individuals with dyslexia, including bullying, social isolation, and the importance of early diagnosis. They discuss the alarming statistics surrounding dyslexia and its correlation with mental health issues, addiction, and incarceration. The conversation emphasizes the need for awareness, understanding, and support systems to help those with learning disabilities navigate their challenges and improve their quality of life.

Chapters:

00:00 The Impact of Learning Disabilities
02:36 Understanding Bullying and Social Isolation
05:36 The Importance of Early Diagnosis
08:24 The Struggles of Growing Up with Learning Disabilities
11:22 The Role of Environment in Bullying
13:58 Addiction and Mental Health Challenges
16:56 The Need for Awareness and Support
22:05 The Impact of School Environment on Friendships
25:09 Navigating Social Connections in Professional Sports
28:06 Understanding Learning Disabilities and Social Isolation
30:07 The Importance of Early Diagnosis
31:57 Statistics on Learning Disabilities and Their Consequences
34:43 The Link Between Learning Disabilities and Addiction
37:02 The Need for Awareness in Medical and Educational Fields

Transcript:
00:00:07:01 - 00:00:14:06
Unknown
Dyslexics are 2 to 3 times more likely to be bullied.

00:00:14:08 - 00:01:00:18
Unknown
Three times more likely to drop out of high school. Only 46% of working age adults with learning disabilities are employed. That's 46% of our adults working age are employed. 60% of people, addicted to drugs and alcohol. 60%. Two times more likely to be suspended. 59% of us do not complete any type of post-secondary education. 85% of incarcerated youth have learning and emotional disabilities.

00:01:00:20 - 00:01:36:13
Unknown
And three times more likely to commit suicide. Okay. I had so many things I wanted. I was like, okay, what's the opposite? Like, so the 46% when that one got me, well, they all got me. But yeah. So it's saying that 46% of people at old age, so 18 and up only have a job. So 46% of people 18 and older that have learning disabilities have a job.

00:01:36:15 - 00:02:00:21
Unknown
So that leads you to 4% of people with learning disorders. I shouldn't say people. Adults don't have a job. Right? But that we're putting 18 year olds in that because that's considered an adult. Because they said now. So I'm an adult. No. Yeah. That's enough from from age 18 up. 54% of people with learning disorders do not have a job.

00:02:00:23 - 00:02:29:06
Unknown
Okay. So today we wanted to open that way because I found that those numbers, you know, you know you know I don't mean to jump all over their on no, no, I found this sitting in my doctor's office waiting for my doctor, you know. Obviously there's a few places people love visiting their doctors and their dentists and, you know, so I'm sitting there, and I actually found this on, I don't know which dyslexic site, so I can't take credit for, you know, these numbers.

00:02:29:08 - 00:02:55:15
Unknown
I can only take credit for these numbers as being one of us. Right. You know, the 2 to 3 times more likely to get bullied. I'm actually I would probably put that higher personally. You would. You know, I would. I don't know what what do you think? You know. Well, I don't know because, you know, because, you know, I mean, we always we talk about this and we have such an interesting I mean, we can go back to the beginning.

00:02:55:15 - 00:03:10:17
Unknown
And the reason why is I wasn't bullied. You know, I wasn't bullied. Montgomery wasn't bullied. None of my kids were bullied because, you know, I mean, they weren't bullied in general. And but I know a lot of people that we've talked to. Because when you said that in the beginning, I was like, okay, there's probably something else going on.

00:03:10:17 - 00:03:25:22
Unknown
And then the more people not that I questioned it, but the more people that we have talked to, their kids are bullied and they don't have a lot of friends. And I'm like that and that. That's where exactly where I was going. What you just, you know, I'm here. How important that point at you. Yeah, we did that last time.

00:03:26:00 - 00:03:57:16
Unknown
I think to also put in there is not having friends. So not necessarily being bullied. Meaning I'm going to steal your lunch money. Yeah. Being bullied, not having friends I will put in that same category. You know you're the weird kid. What's wrong with you? Not being relatable. You're not relatable, right? You know, I, I put that in on those numbers to to to your point.

00:03:57:16 - 00:04:14:16
Unknown
Like you never had that. You know, you said in your Montgomery all your kid I, I did. You do. And a lot of people that we've spoken to, I mean, even like, you know, Danielle, that I work with, I was actually surprised by her saying that she didn't feel like she fit in a lot. And I was like, what?

00:04:14:17 - 00:04:39:20
Unknown
I was like, what are you talking about? And I was. And she's like, no, not. She's like certain people. Yes. Like when we played lacrosse. Like she was like, obviously I connected with you. She goes, but there was a lot of disconnect. And I it's an interesting thing because I thought about it like over the years, I've really actually thought about it because it is something that when people talk about, you know, there's times where I thought that the word bully got pushed around too much and I'd be like, oh my God, you know, in school it's like, okay, that's what they're talking about.

00:04:39:20 - 00:04:55:20
Unknown
Bully. And I'm like, okay, well, let's get to the Band-Aid. Like, what is the reason? Like, there has to be there's a reason underneath it. And so I've always been I don't want to say fascinating because that sounds like that's not the word I want to use, but I've always questioned that a little bit more of digging deeper to that.

00:04:55:20 - 00:05:12:02
Unknown
And what is that? Is it where you grew up like, you know, now again, I have just we have different personalities. When I was talking to Dwight, I remember Dwight, I had a little bit more of like how I was and Bridgette had a little bit more like I was where her brother had a little bit more. He was ostracized and felt different.

00:05:12:02 - 00:05:30:18
Unknown
So, like, there is something in there. I know that relationships are that is one of my things that are I am I'm gifted at right. Like and so maybe it's that that little thing where, where you have a little bit more where you can see the future insight. Maybe that was like extra little key that I got, I don't know.

00:05:30:18 - 00:05:48:21
Unknown
Okay. I don't you know what I mean. Like a little thing, I don't know, but I, I see it and like and as I said in the beginning, there was times where I was like, I don't know if it's that high because I didn't experienced it and my kids didn't experience it. And I know that the kids maybe that were considered bully bullied in our schools, they didn't have learning disability.

00:05:48:21 - 00:06:06:20
Unknown
And so I really thought about it. And then I was thinking about the kids that I grew up with, and I was like, oh, all right. You know, it falls back on to you. Everything we talked about or about early diagnosis. Right. How many kids? I mean, like, you just you just stated like, I don't remember my past.

00:06:06:22 - 00:06:39:00
Unknown
Very small bits and pieces. I, you know, I cannot sit down. I couldn't sit down with and have a conversation, you know, a long conversation about my past because there's so many blocks, like, there's so much I don't remember. Oh, you know, where you're, you know, like ancestries and like. So to your question to, you know, that you just said that you just stayed there like, not now you think back you saw these kids and have learning stories, but you know, 80% of us never got diagnosed till after, right?

00:06:39:05 - 00:07:07:07
Unknown
They were they were they were in this petty classes that I, you know, sometimes was in sometimes was out because again we talked about my, my history. No, like it is. There's so much to it. And it is because either they are acting out right. They you either become the angry kids. So then people are like, you know, you're you're the I don't know, it's when how many meetings and how many.

00:07:07:09 - 00:07:27:04
Unknown
Your for the foundation, for the podcast, for dyslexia. How many people have we been on calls with where they have no clue what I'm talking about. Yeah. And they also. So I do want people to go back and look that up. I know we didn't state the reference and that's like the proper thing to do. You're supposed to state your reference.

00:07:27:04 - 00:07:53:18
Unknown
So people can go back and look, just Google it and you'll find it right. You know, I'll, you know, I'll sit and it's, you know, on the, on the foundation, you know, we'll post, you know, post these ones always. But, you know, if you know, in my mind, we've only have 9 or 10% of people diagnosed, diagnosed with dyslexia.

00:07:53:20 - 00:08:20:13
Unknown
That's your. Huge numbers that aren't right. So for me, you know, still to this day, the hardest thing is being misunderstood. And, you know, all these meetings and turning around and think that our, you know, you're out there, you're you're a lunatic. You're crazy. At least I, I can know that. Not right. Being 40 over 40, you're going to be 49.

00:08:20:13 - 00:08:43:04
Unknown
Okay. Yeah. Thanks. Thanks. Her sister's going to almost 40. Laura. That's. She'll be 40 in February. So everybody tell her that, but it's at least I know now I'm dyslexic. Right? I we know, and we get off meetings, you know, we'll call off the meeting. How'd that go? And we knew exactly where we were.

00:08:43:04 - 00:09:01:17
Unknown
But that's because I got an understanding of who I am now. Right? But it was, you know, you know, I as a parent, said, I remember this years ago, and this is after, like, why don't you want, why don't you just tell me what you see. You tell that to a kid. What do you mean what they see.

00:09:01:17 - 00:09:25:02
Unknown
And a kid gets frustrated and you're trying to tell them the story. And it will miss piggy in the three walls, in the sticks whatever that is. And they get so frustrated just to try that, you know that's the mental how you know that falls under bullying because it doesn't stop now. You become the weird kid and you're just saying crazy things, right?

00:09:25:02 - 00:09:46:23
Unknown
You know, and you know, and then they're over there playing tag and your last one, pet, your these all add up. So I guess under the word and you're heading bully. There's there's things to fall under that. Right. So because so my question is and this might be like something that needs to be thought about and something we can discuss later.

00:09:46:23 - 00:10:12:19
Unknown
But when a kid is struggling because someone that's bullied, it's usually there's a weakness. Right. And again, I do think there's a lot of geological geographical like it depends. It's really not geographical. But like depends on where you are, where you're growing up, your grade. Like if you think about and you probably don't think about these things. So you're going to be like, what the fuck are you talking about?

00:10:12:23 - 00:10:35:18
Unknown
But because I grew up with, there was five of us. It was always like talked about like, oh, my sister, my older, one of my older sisters, like her grade was a terrible grade. I mean, people that's like just not good. Like they didn't have like a good core group of of kids, blah, blah, blah. My other sister, hers was like a fast grade, like there.

00:10:35:18 - 00:10:53:11
Unknown
And then I had a, like a good grade. My sister Megan had like a really good tight knit group. My brother had a good grade, but there's like the in between grades, like we would always be like, oh, thank God I'm not in that grade, right? They didn't they didn't say that every year. Every year. Yeah, right. Like every year there's there's a group I remember parent.

00:10:53:12 - 00:11:29:07
Unknown
Yeah. Right. So like and some like people don't click on it because it's just something you know whatever. You know how I believe like there's there's reasons for things I think that sometimes when someone is the harder you get sometimes things when you're younger you develop this armor, right. Like if you maybe didn't have a tough time in school, would you been able to be as successful as a hockey player because of the fucking shit that like, people would say to you all the time, like you know, there's so much to it, but there's a reason in my mind sometimes how things go, but is not for a reason.

00:11:29:09 - 00:11:57:10
Unknown
Yeah, I, I would totally believe that now. So is it that the kid that is struggling is someone that's insecure? Notice as they're struggling and then they're the target? Or is it like they're taken out and like the teacher's taking them out. So then it's like, oh, we know that you're the one who is struggling. And like what I was growing up, I wasn't taken out because, right, I wasn't I, I wasn't identified until later in life.

00:11:57:15 - 00:12:17:06
Unknown
Montgomery, where he was he everyone like gifted and talented kids got taken out. You know, he also like it's so it's just interesting like there's a whole make up and I don't know if I'm making any sense, but there's a whole makeup to everything and like that to me. What is the the straw that all of a sudden it's like, that kid's the target.

00:12:17:06 - 00:12:37:00
Unknown
Like, what is it? Is it one thing, is it a accumulation of things? Am I making any sense? Yeah. You want? Yeah. But what's your point? Is I give up my hockey career to find out, just like a young age. So to your point, totally. You know, to your point. Fuck that. It made me who I am.

00:12:37:02 - 00:13:03:20
Unknown
You're right. It did. But fuck you, you know? Know what? She's going through that I think it's there's always one. There's always one defining moment like, oh, I saw his he was talking to his mom. Are great too. He kissed his mom. There's always one defining moment that you're you. You said you love you to your mom or you, you know, but it's it's always our consider.

00:13:03:20 - 00:13:33:12
Unknown
Obviously. You're you're not in first in this mask. Like you're not first in line for this or you're not, you know, your take a second to answer questions. Right. Maybe you're you're trying to process all what are you stupid? What's taking so long? It's an easy answer, right? There's all those things, from kids. They know it like kids are assholes, you know, you've got to.

00:13:33:12 - 00:13:56:17
Unknown
They want to make up their own language and their words and your, And got it. And have kids know now because, let me tell you, I would be shutting a lot of things down, but it's they all thought I was weird. Still, to this day, I, I'm considered as a weirdo.

00:13:56:18 - 00:14:20:08
Unknown
Dinner. You know, in school, you're the weirdo like you. You know, just the simple left some rights right? Or you've got the funny looking pencil. But when you do find it, then you do something with it, like using it. You know, it's just you, you know, trying to fill your laps, right? Oh, you're counting too much on your finger like kids pick.

00:14:20:08 - 00:14:51:21
Unknown
Think these are the things that get picked out without even, you know, noticing yet. So it's those little things that add up also quickly. And then I wonder. How many of it is your an older kid or an only kids, right, right. That's a that's I mean there's so much things because the other thing is like thinking about you know, we know that kids that do the bullying are not comfortable with who they are.

00:14:51:23 - 00:15:08:08
Unknown
And so that's like also the makeup, right. Like of of a grade and like where they are and it it's like they're the ones that are like oh I feel shit about myself. So I'm going to make someone else feel shit. Right. So what's going on behind there? Like it's just there's so many things that lead into it.

00:15:08:08 - 00:15:29:02
Unknown
But the whole I mean, the reason why I wanted to get into this a little bit is, is just the thoughts of, you know, these are big numbers. These are really big numbers. They're play into, you know, right now there's so much talk about longevity and health and how can we live longer and healthier. And that's that's a crazy conversation.

00:15:29:04 - 00:15:50:18
Unknown
I think it's the dumbest conversation ever. Longevity I don't want to live long I know okay. A lot of people. Yeah like they were talking about some some I don't know, maybe it was Putin or somebody and they're trying to live for another 200. Yeah. I'm like, fuck that. Okay. I'm good. Yeah I don't know about that. But I want to live.

00:15:50:18 - 00:16:08:22
Unknown
What what the time that I have on this earth. I want to live as healthy and as clear minded as I possibly can. I know, I know, I do, I really do, and I'm feeling I'm not saying I'm not making the faces at you. I'm like, I'm feeling is good. And I feel like is good for everybody.

00:16:09:00 - 00:16:40:10
Unknown
Yeah, I have that. No. Right. Well, I ever get that. No. And that's okay because it's it's what we're trying to do for everybody else. It's right. You know, it's it's breaking down like the 84, 85% of incarcerated youth, right? I mean, it's just it's so fight like that's fucking, you know, obviously. And it says in here have learning and or emotional disabilities.

00:16:40:12 - 00:17:13:12
Unknown
85 that's the next generation of our world. And they feel ignored and dismissed and not seen. Not heard, not understood. Don't know three times higher risk to attempt suicide. Oh absolutely. I would have said, you know a little bit more than that. Obviously we've known and we've talked about the, 60%, 60% addicted to drugs and alcohol at some point of their life.

00:17:13:12 - 00:17:53:21
Unknown
Right? At some point, those numbers are. Crazy. So I have when I was on that television show, that piece in Connecticut, the guy afterwards said to me, gosh, your story and I, he was like, were you ever like, in trouble? Like, did you ever get in the wrong crowd and do, like, bad things? And I was like, no, I mean, listen, I was like, I probably did some risky things, but no, I never really got in trouble.

00:17:53:23 - 00:18:12:02
Unknown
He's like, you would think, you know, that you would. And he's like, you know, were you ever he's like, this is really personal. I'm sorry. He's like, I probably shouldn't be asking that, but have you ever been addicted to anything? And I said, well, I had a sister that was addicted to drugs, so I really didn't ever want to give my parents any, like, you know, any more heartache there.

00:18:12:02 - 00:18:36:15
Unknown
But I definitely drank way too much. And he was like, okay, that's kind of what I was looking for, but I didn't mean it in a I just if you said no, I was totally fine. I was like, I definitely did some risky things in my years because of drinking probably too much and all of those things. And so, like if you think about.

00:18:36:17 - 00:18:55:16
Unknown
The depths of that, you think of parents. So it's. Grass. Everybody who doesn't have, you know, learning sort. We don't want to have them. Right. We don't want to feel this way.

00:18:55:18 - 00:19:28:04
Unknown
Like if you guys had, a video screen or TV or something, watching my brain, like, watched, like my thoughts and what goes on there, you would run for the goddamn hills so fast. You know, it was about laughing this week and, like, how we get things done is no. Hey, she just broke her Heinz ketchup pillow. But how?

00:19:28:06 - 00:19:55:06
Unknown
You know how her eyes. He's talking about the dog, not his wife. Sorry, folks, but how? And I complete a task together is so different than anybody else. And I think you've talked about, you know, dads, you know, he can do one thing, right. He simply can't multitask at the levels that we can. And we're mounts with tasking 65 different things but a normal can't.

00:19:55:06 - 00:20:19:05
Unknown
They're like how you know. So, the fear of, the disbelief, the deer, the white Isaac, how are you doing all this? Try doing that every day. All day. And we don't want to. We'd like just to do one simple thing. And I think that's boring, though, I don't know, I don't want to do one simple thing.

00:20:19:06 - 00:20:46:02
Unknown
It's it's a heck of a lot easier. Yes. And less stress. Yes, there's a less stress, right? All those, you know, and all those things encompass. So if you can take, you know, s'more, take a gummy, if you can take a drink, if you could take a pill and release that four minutes.

00:20:46:04 - 00:21:10:05
Unknown
We do it. Just to have that, just to have that, you know, have that relief. Right. So it's, we're not purposely trying to get you, you know, nail it every day. You know, it gets to that point, but it's to, to relieve that pain, right? All the anxiety, all that, all that pressure, it's like popping open a can.

00:21:10:11 - 00:21:34:19
Unknown
All that gas is gone, right? It's just a get relief. Like for a moment, I mean, I know like at the end of the week that's when I was like, oh, I can't wait just to get shitfaced. Well that was and then I'm standing in front of a pizza, you know. Right. That that's what we're going to talk about when it's, you know, when it comes to that those high numbers of addiction is just can we escape from that for five minutes.

00:21:34:21 - 00:22:02:16
Unknown
Oh we did how how do you do it all. We took a pill. Okay. Well I'm starting to feel that I want I don't want to I don't want to feel that again. All right. There's a pill to like it. It ramps up very, very, very quick, very quickly. Yeah. Then now you're down a different rabbit hole and trying to get, you know, the sober parts of it then now you look at these numbers, you go back to these numbers.

00:22:02:16 - 00:22:09:09
Unknown
Now you're, you're like were a part of these numbers. Right? And now it's like, oh.

00:22:09:11 - 00:22:26:02
Unknown
No I don't fit it. Like where do I turn in school? You know, I don't have a friend in this class. Like how many kids are trying to find friends? You know, you're kid. You know, you you obviously. Penelope. True. I want to be in class with. You know, my friends are in this class, so I want to be in this class right?

00:22:26:04 - 00:22:49:11
Unknown
But what if you never have that? There's never a friend in your class because you don't have a friend. What do you do? Or you're in a class with people that you know, have, you know, these are what, like some of these lower level classes. I mean, Montgomery talks about that on the first podcast, right? You know how he was like, these are the kids that I was hanging out with, and they were not doing good things.

00:22:49:13 - 00:23:04:19
Unknown
And I knew that, like, something he's like, I didn't do as many bad things, but there was some times where I was like, and then he was like, I can't keep going down this road. I know I want to go to college. So I but you know, a lot of kids don't have that wherewithal on their own. They don't come from families that are also noticing it.

00:23:04:19 - 00:23:25:09
Unknown
Or I mean, I have to say, I when he talks about that, I was like, like, wait, what? What was I mean, he didn't get in trouble. No one called. So I was like, I didn't know you were, you know, leaving class and and fucking around, you know, because if you're if you. I always called the lecturer who wants to sit in a chair or can I please.

00:23:25:11 - 00:23:51:02
Unknown
Right. And that's what school is. It's easier for us to make bad decisions, you know, in that younger, you know, younger age it's easier. Yeah. Because that's where our confidence is. That's where we believe we are like you're your devil angel on your on each shoulder. It's where do you connect with it. And but it also can be like a fun right.

00:23:51:02 - 00:24:10:05
Unknown
You're like, oh I'm getting out of doing this. They're getting out of doing this. I want to go get out of doing that. So now I'm joining the group that is now getting into trouble because it's taking us away from actually learning. So I'm going to jump in and yeah, I'll meet you in the bathroom, you know, like whatever, you know, and I wouldn't even say much.

00:24:10:08 - 00:24:27:07
Unknown
So much of it is, you know, it's getting out. I don't want to. I'd almost disagree with it. It's now all okay. I, I might make a friend. Oh yeah. See, I don't I don't see it that way. Right. Yeah, I know because that's where I look at it. Right. Oh no, I wouldn't look at it the way you just said it.

00:24:27:07 - 00:24:41:21
Unknown
I look at it the other way. Yes. I'm not doing the work right like that. Just goes hand in hand. But it's like, oh, I might become friends with John, or I might be friends with Jay, or I might be friends just, you know, Robert, by doing this, that's how I would look at what you just said, isn't it?

00:24:42:01 - 00:24:58:01
Unknown
But see, this is why this is what's so interesting. That's why I love when we get into these conversations. Yeah, because I would never have looked at that way because again, Montgomery had friends out of these classes, right? He had a different group that he was friends with because of sports that were all in the good, in the good classes.

00:24:58:01 - 00:25:18:11
Unknown
They were all in the good classes. He just happened not to be, but they didn't know that he was in these lower level classes. They just knew that he wasn't in theirs. But he made friends easy. So but you know, yeah, for me in the you know, I played 18 years, there wasn't once not one time in 18 years pro like we go on their own.

00:25:18:16 - 00:25:39:04
Unknown
We lived on the road forever where I had a guaranteed friend for dinner. He thought it was easy. You always is. Like zero. Everybody had their friends, their groups say, y'all go to dinner or whatever, stay stick, you know, stayed. You want to tell me whatever what you want? I never had one time where I had a guaranteed friend to go for dinner.

00:25:39:06 - 00:25:59:23
Unknown
I had to search for it, you know, besides, you know, like to team dinners or whatever, but we're on the road in Boston. No, for y'all, I'm. And I'm searching for, you know, a dinner partner every single time. That sucks. That sucks. You know? And if I didn't find it, a room service. And a lot of times, running.

00:25:59:23 - 00:26:26:14
Unknown
The kids were younger. First night was room service. Anyways, I'm like, no, y'all and kids bunk beds. I was gonna say, yeah, I say sometimes it was nice to move in anyways, but I never had. I never once had, a friend I could turn to. Never once, 18 years pro hockey. I had to search for roommates.

00:26:26:16 - 00:26:46:10
Unknown
I had to search for, you know. Yeah. And I want to say, because this is what's so interesting, because I've heard, like, interviews or you've talked to about it before, too, like that your teammates, they weren't aware of it. Like they would be like, oh, no, we were friends. Right. But you know. No, you know, I don't mean to be.

00:26:46:12 - 00:27:09:12
Unknown
Yeah. I want to state this. I didn't have my teammates weren't assholes to me. Right. I want to, you know, make that very clear. Fox up or fox soaps. No, it wasn't that at all. We just didn't have a connection. I wasn't say you didn't feel like you fit in. You didn't feel comfortable being like, oh, this is the person I can go and just be like, oh, I know we're meeting.

00:27:09:12 - 00:27:22:17
Unknown
Like, you had to think in your head, oh, who's going to who's going where? Who do I you know, I'm going to say, you guys going to dinner or, you know, what are you doing out in the lobby? Grammar key nail. Right. Hey, you guys going our meeting here? Like that's what you had to ask? Yeah, I had to ask.

00:27:22:17 - 00:27:40:22
Unknown
So it's. And I'm on the state that very clear. I left the game with no friends. But it's not like they were mean to me. Yeah, not like they're trying to ostracize me or, you know, that was never the case. Ever, ever, ever. It was just I didn't connect. Meaning connect. Right. I'm glad that you cleared that up.

00:27:41:00 - 00:28:00:21
Unknown
Not an only reason, because it's good for, like, just to hear it, too. It wasn't like that, right? You weren't bullied as a no no, right. But as a as a kid that falls under the same umbrella, like, why can't, you know, you know, as a little girl, Sarah wants to play with, you know, Penelope and and they want to play like.

00:28:00:23 - 00:28:30:11
Unknown
No, I want to play you like. Yeah. They're not. She wasn't bowling. But that falls into the same category to me because obviously it gets worse. But no, I'm not playing with you. You're weird. That's what I got basically my whole life. Right. And I do want to make this clear as well, because I think that just because you have learning disabilities, there could there's so much that goes into it.

00:28:30:11 - 00:29:06:07
Unknown
But you specifically, you didn't understand yourself. You didn't have that connection with people and that there's so many kids that have learning disabilities that are feeling the same way. And so that's why we're talking about this in this, in this fashion. Because it's not, again, like, you know, there's kids that get bullied that maybe don't have learning disabilities, but there's, there's, you know, there's something there's something there, but the majority and that's why that we have those percentages to show, because you didn't feel the connection and you didn't have that because and the yours is directly because of your learning disabilities that you did not know about.

00:29:06:10 - 00:29:23:04
Unknown
And I remember when we, you know, earlier when we talked about this, when I said I would put a higher percentage of dyslexics not having friends and having friends and you look at me like you, I'm crazy, y'all, I did. Yeah, because I was because my world was different. But the majority of, you know, am I not correct.

00:29:23:06 - 00:29:45:15
Unknown
A lot of people that we talked to, that we have spoken to, the kids did not have a solid friend group. Correct? Totally. And I think I again, I think it was maybe myself. Bridget and one of our new friends now and maybe Dan Serino, and I'm saying his name wrong and I always say it wrong, but I feel like we didn't.

00:29:45:15 - 00:30:03:12
Unknown
But the rest. And if you think about it, I mean, obviously Montgomery I mean, Bradley talked about. Right? I mean, Montgomery didn't, but Bradley talked about, you know, that he had his one friend, but it was because they both were dyslexic and they happened to be in the same class. And then and then Bradley the first conceiving. Yeah, he got diagnosed early and was comfortable with that.

00:30:03:12 - 00:30:19:07
Unknown
And then he did have like a good friend group when he was in high school. I mean like a big one where Montgomery went to many different schools so had friend groups. But they, you know, he went to 4 or 5 different school. So it was like, okay, yes, I still have my core people. But then you leave.

00:30:19:07 - 00:30:36:06
Unknown
And then he had to make new core people. So he was very good at making new friends. But that's also as we know he's a charmer like that, that, again, is one of his gifts in making that connection with people in that way and knowing how to get around it. But most people that we have talked to, you are 100% correct.

00:30:36:08 - 00:30:56:19
Unknown
They said that they didn't have the connection. And I do want to be very clear when we're talking about getting people diagnosed early, like how important it is, it is so important the numbers, they're still going to be bullying. It's not there's always going to be bullying. That is just sucks. That's the way life is. But this will alleviate and help with it.

00:30:56:21 - 00:31:20:05
Unknown
There's going to be kids, you know, that are still mean to other kids, whatever. Because maybe the kids it means are not right. And so it's not alleviating it, but it's going to take the numbers out of the learning disability. The kids with dyslexic being in clump clumped into that young one. If I started school today, I have obviously I've got way more understanding of who I am and and what dyslexia is, right?

00:31:20:09 - 00:32:02:06
Unknown
You know, obviously what we've been doing for a number of years and foundation being in a eight year. So if I walked in school, I could navigate it better. I have understanding and that's all here. Everybody is. Every parent can now you if you get a formal diagnosis, parents can advocate for their kids in the proper way. And what I mean by that is if you don't have a formal diagnosis, you know, I think it's X or I think it's Y or they, you know, the school identified that's still not 100% correct, right?

00:32:02:08 - 00:32:28:18
Unknown
Your guess. Right. As a parent, you can't 100% the advocate for your kid without a formal diagnosis. And then most parents are finding out for the first time about dyslexia. Like myself, I didn't hear the word till I was 32 years old. And, you know, here we are now, got my daughter. I didn't advocate properly for my daughter because I was learning to.

00:32:28:20 - 00:32:48:19
Unknown
I never heard the word. So now I'm like, oh my God, with dyslexia, just like every other parent, I'm going to Google and figure out what do you have to do? And we got a Wilson reading tutor. And right, like, I could have done things so much better if I wanted more understanding about dyslexia, but I couldn't because I didn't have the understanding that I think it's very important.

00:32:48:21 - 00:33:12:03
Unknown
And so those numbers are just things for you guys to think about, because it is, you know, it's real. It's there. You know, we talk about the 50% of prison inmates, you know, I mean, even five of incarcerated youth that, you know, kills me three times more likely to drop out of high school three times. Yeah, that doesn't surprise me at all.

00:33:12:05 - 00:33:34:18
Unknown
And then also, 59% of I don't want to complete a secondary. But that does not surprise me. No, not at all. But again, and that's harmful to 60%. You know, the 59% of non complete secondary. No. We deal right. And that it's a unless it's a goal of the person because then they feel shit. Right. Right. But just three times more likely to drop out of high school.

00:33:34:18 - 00:34:00:21
Unknown
Like yes. Can you be successful high school. Yes. We can look around right now. There's billionaires right? They never completed high school. The second, second, secondary education may not be important to, certain sex, right? Mechanic or plumber or an entrepreneur. All right. Entrepreneur. Great. Awesome. You can do it. Not worried about that? The three times more likely is to happen, drop out of high school.

00:34:00:23 - 00:34:19:07
Unknown
That's a big number. They may not be able to finish the high school, you know, because it's not a choice. And that's the thing. Like, that's what I want people to hear. It's not a choice. It's like, yes, they drop out, but it's because of how hard it is to be there and how you're not seen or heard and you're just pushed through how many times.

00:34:19:07 - 00:34:35:17
Unknown
And I don't mean to interrupt you, but how many times have we talked to people that we know they were just pushed through? I was pushed through. I was given a D in Latin because I could not there was no. Yeah. They gave us so pumped to get a D. Well no they I failed, but he gave me a D because I, he let me cheat.

00:34:35:18 - 00:34:53:18
Unknown
Do you know what I mean. Like and I knew that this what you're passing for me it was 50 to 50%. Yeah. I saw I got 50s and 50 ones. Yeah. Teachers just passed me. Right. And, I mean, Montgomery talked about it, right? Like he know he knew there was teachers that didn't like that he did not get the grade.

00:34:53:18 - 00:35:19:08
Unknown
But he was like, and that feeling is shit feeling. But there's so many kids that don't even have school districts that are like, we care about even just passing you. Right? Like we're we're just going to fail you because they're not looking under the hood. They're not seeing what's there. They're not there to help. It's just like, you know, these districts where in Chicago, New York and cities that have 0%, you know, graduation rate, high school.

00:35:19:08 - 00:35:57:16
Unknown
I mean, it's ridiculous. That's. Yeah, that's a whole different. You know, we've talked about that many times, but it's your just just the numbers. Right. It all comes down to diagnosis and understanding. Diagnosis and understanding will lower these numbers astronomically. Like 85% of incarcerated youth. We would lower that. Oh tremendous I mean, huge I.

00:35:57:18 - 00:36:34:06
Unknown
I bet you we could cut that in half. Yeah. I was gonna say even lower, but we know my math, so yeah. Oh 100%. We could cut that in in half and we could get 100%, 50% very easily. You go into a school and get every kid diagnosed that will drop. Yep. That's that's that's crazy. You know, and then the other portion is, I had dinner or, lunch with a buddy of mine who know he runs rehabs.

00:36:34:06 - 00:37:00:16
Unknown
You know, he's been sober, off of heroin. Amazing. Married. Great guy. You didn't buy me my taco salad, though. I have a taco salad. Pizza joint was. Was like one of the first dates with a taco. She's like, you're having a taco salad at a pizza shop. And. Yeah. So good. But you know where I was going with that?

00:37:00:16 - 00:37:26:05
Unknown
It's so they, I think the guy he worked for, he's a think he's the vice president of the of this company. They have eight, ten, 12 rehab facilities and they don't talk about learning disorders. So you talk about 85% incarcerated rate, 6% are addicted. So take that 60%. How many people are those going to go to rehab?

00:37:26:07 - 00:37:51:17
Unknown
A lot of them. And now what happens. They don't. Their main trauma would be clearly learning disorders. And they never address them. They don't talk about right. Don't even talk about the meds. What that you know what that could be like. This is all entwined so deeply in your. So did Nick sober. He's been sober like you know.

00:37:51:19 - 00:38:24:21
Unknown
And look where he is now today. Right. And he still didn't even understand, you know, this back side of proportion. What is losing what is leading to the collapse of our youth? In my mind. Yeah. Who wants to be walk, walk around all day long and not be seen? We all want to be loved. Every single one of us want to be loved by at least one person.

00:38:24:23 - 00:38:51:03
Unknown
But when you can't break down these walls, when you can't learn to love yourself, how are you going to let somebody love you where you need to be? And how are you going to reciprocate loving them? And how are you going to be able to verbalize what you need if you can't understand it? The depths of of of all this is, you know, is staggering.

00:38:51:03 - 00:39:14:16
Unknown
And that's what nobody ever talks about. And when I was at my doctor, Where now she's a guy, you know, she's been the doctor for. That's where, we've been for 20 or 15 years, but, you know, so, Nora, for, for a long, long time, Scouts Foundation kind of started talking about it and we're talking about dyslexia.

00:39:14:16 - 00:39:33:00
Unknown
And and I was talking about some of these stats because I was sitting in her office. Yeah. And she's she went to med school and she said there's like two lines in med school about dyslexia. I guess it's the same education. It's a joke. It is a joke. So people are coming into our I said to her, I said, you know, people come in there and get diagnosed with anxiety.

00:39:33:00 - 00:39:50:14
Unknown
You know, we ask, why keep the that's not your friend. You don't have your friend. We got squirrels out there. So she sees the squirrels. That's again my dog. She wants not not my wife, not my wife, my wife. She does see squirrels too. There's some black squirrel. We got some black squirrels. So she. She likes box girls with the puffy tails.

00:39:50:14 - 00:40:14:07
Unknown
But, you know, again, she's a doctor. She's been practicing for 20, 25 years, 30 years. You know, she's, I think late 50s. So she's been doing this for a long time. 30 years. No clue. So how many how many people she diagnosed with ADHD. How many people is she diagnosed in her office with? Anxiety or depression and not finding out where the root is?

00:40:14:07 - 00:40:43:22
Unknown
It's it's I mean, listen, super lady, but. Yeah, and I'm not you're not being mean at all. I'm just trying to try to paint a picture for people out there that listening, nobody understands now. And it's the same the education world and the medical world, and it's just makes me chuckle in a in a frustrated chuckle. Not like a ha like a I don't I'm not going to do a frustrating chuckle, but oh, please do, because know I don't know if I haven't got a frustrated, frustrated chuckle is there?

00:40:44:00 - 00:41:10:15
Unknown
Yeah. Hahaha. I don't know. It's not like a, upbeat. It's more of a like a you want to get like an anger. Oh, how I chuckle. Yeah, yeah yeah. Exactly like that. I'm in both of these worlds. I'm in the medical world now, and I'm in the education world with this foundation and the stuff that I do for fat tech and talking to doctors, and we don't talk about dyslexia, but the stuff that even I'm like, I don't understand how I know more than everyone.

00:41:10:15 - 00:41:31:02
Unknown
And I'm not saying this from an ego way, but I don't understand how I know more about certain things than people that are so highly educated. And I just know it because of life. And it's it blows my mind every time. And I used to probably back in the day, like kind of sweep it under the rug. But in my head now I give myself, I make myself like I'm like, you know what?

00:41:31:03 - 00:41:48:12
Unknown
You're really smart and this and that. You should be proud of yourself. That I actually can connect dots that others can't. And it's not their fault. It's just the way that they are. And that's your brain, right? And that's it. Oh, yeah. And that's what it's a beautiful thing. And I do I do see that now, you know.

00:41:48:12 - 00:42:05:14
Unknown
And and that is and that is the thing that nobody understands. We talk about this all the time. There's a second way to think. You know, I did when I was trying to and I saw a buddy recently tell Mohawk he's a guy. You know, I've showed the kids your this and tell them bench, you come back. They're doing this.

00:42:05:16 - 00:42:24:06
Unknown
And I was trying to explain to him, you know that you know the visual audio processing, you know, and yelling. He couldn't understand it either. Like he was kind of stubborn as well. Yeah. I can't play if you can't do it. Well, you're right when you're a pro, right? Like you, Brian, you're not going to do what I asked you, right, right right right, right.

00:42:24:06 - 00:42:42:20
Unknown
You're talking. And he's he's got nine and ten year old kids. He was getting frustrated with some of the kids. I'm like, why? Because they're not understanding what you're saying, Tom. And he wasn't asking, you know, and he wasn't understanding what I was saying to him. To him. Right. Because he's not one of us. Right? Right. So that's how different our brains are.

00:42:42:20 - 00:43:06:01
Unknown
And that's what nobody ever talks about, is our brains are different. Our brains are wired differently. We process information differently. And there's nothing no, no, it's no wrong or right. It's just that's where your brain is. You have to understand it. And that's where they are articulating it to the other people is hard. It is. And that's where the bullying comes into play.

00:43:06:03 - 00:43:19:01
Unknown
Is it. And you're an idiot. You're not listening to me. What are you talking about. Stop being lazy or you know those are the rebuttals that we get from people.

00:43:19:03 - 00:43:37:20
Unknown
I want to leave it at that. I want people just to chew on the statistics. And, I didn't even mention word blindness. So I want to say thank you for joining word blindness dyslexia expose because we entered a little different to order. You might be like, we didn't say it. I did that on purpose. Because I wanted people to really listen when they first started.

00:43:37:22 - 00:43:54:12
Unknown
So I'm going to say it what I always say though, like rate, review and share for all of you that have stayed with it to the end to the last moment, don't forget to share and write a review. If you've been listening and you love this podcast, write a review. You can go to Apple or Spotify and you just scroll down.

00:43:54:12 - 00:44:18:22
Unknown
If you're doing it on your phone, you scroll down a little bit and you can rate and review their write review questions concerns. There's not a topic that we're not going to touch upon. Yeah. Because this is all entwined in everything. And, you know, in marriage, you know, in dating, in education, in work, play. And so, like, there's this go on in your life.

00:44:19:00 - 00:44:36:20
Unknown
It's it's so true. If you go to the sober foundation.org, you can click on inquire and the emails will go to us. But I mean, I would love someone to also, you know, get into a fight about it. I do have we of our toys. Our toys are always like that. Her we choose the ears and like everything off.

00:44:36:22 - 00:45:09:10
Unknown
But you should see the the fur, the white fur fires or whatever this is. That's all over everywhere and everywhere. But, kind of sad, I know, because it's a catch up. Catch up is now the number one condiment, number one topper, number one meal. Who says this is you? Me? Oh, I thought this was another statistic. Yeah, this is another statistic, but it's coming straight from a friend.

00:45:09:10 - 00:45:17:12
Unknown
So this is a bread statistic. Yeah. Dip in more ketchup I love it. All right. We're going to stop there.