S4E7: The Kid in the Chair - Advocacy in Action

In this episode, we discuss the significance of Dyslexia Awareness Month, the importance of focusing on the 'kid in the chair', and the emotional and educational challenges faced by individuals with dyslexia. We emphasize the need for genuine advocacy and support, while also recognizing the unique gifts that dyslexia can bring. The conversation highlights the importance of self-awareness and understanding the struggles that children with dyslexia face in educational settings.

 

Chapters

 

00:00 Introduction and Full Moon Energies

01:52 Dyslexia Awareness Month Initiatives

05:09 The Importance of the 'Kid in the Chair'

07:43 Dyslexia as a Gift and Its Challenges

09:35 Understanding Struggles in Education

18:50 The Emotional Impact of Dyslexia

23:05 Self-Awareness and Closing Thoughts

 

Transcript:

00:00:06:23 - 00:00:31:23

Unknown

Welcome back to Irvine. This to sexy expose from Juliet Hutton here with my co-host Brant Sokol. Happy Monday. It's Monday. Sunday morning. It is Monday. The sun is shining. I have to say, it's a. This is not October. You know. What is it today? The sixth six. Oh, okay. So it's October 6th and there is a giant full moon tonight, right?

 

00:00:32:00 - 00:00:50:21

Unknown

Full moon. Okay. Yeah. So there's going to be some weird energies out there. I just want to anyone that's listening when they're listening to this, when this goes out. Because it's going to go out after obviously the full moon, they might go back and be like, oh interesting. Whereas retrograde today it's that doesn't happen until November. Mercury retrograde is November.

 

00:00:51:01 - 00:01:14:23

Unknown

I believe it starts on the fourth. So we'll start feeling it at the end. We had some of those conversations this weekend, and my one cousin was like, yeah, I don't really believe in that kind of stuff. And I was like, that's fine. That's each our own. But that's not why we're that's not what we're talking about on our dyslexia podcast.

 

00:01:15:01 - 00:01:34:20

Unknown

I saw in something that, picture was, the Peace Bridge. Yes. So that was in Buffalo. Yeah, that's the Peace Bridge. And then what was the other? And, I don't know, the other bridge is,

 

00:01:34:22 - 00:02:04:04

Unknown

Bridge that separates us. Canada. Yes. And one of the, one of the families that you've sent, the Starbucks, it's like six Starbucks and their son. Where is that? Her name is Tiffany. She's such a wonderful soul. She did an event, and she's probably listening to that. So very good job. They did an event in Buffalo, and, it's the peace bridge between the U.S. and Canada in red, and then buildings all over Buffalo and red for dyslexia awareness.

 

00:02:04:09 - 00:02:22:11

Unknown

Which is awesome. She did an event and, you know, had to have people bring stories and did all these, like, really beautiful things at the beginning of October for Dyslexic Awareness Month and I think that was is really cool. I mean, it's a really cool thing I didn't realize read did you know? I mean, Red's my favorite color.

 

00:02:22:11 - 00:02:50:11

Unknown

We know that Red's Dyslexia awareness color. Yeah. As we talked about who who pick that I know, like, who picked the month. How long were the lights on? Just for the night? I don't know, I can find out, though. You know what you know, which is, you know, which is cool, but it's, you know, you bring it, you know, it's cool that they'll do that, you know, but it's going a little bit further, right?

 

00:02:50:11 - 00:03:18:14

Unknown

You know, you New York? Yeah. You know, New York. That's where you are, right? And so it's easy for them to, to flip a light on. Right. Coincide with whatever that event is you're paying for. I don't know, purple whatever. You know, obviously did for dyslexia. What was the follow through after that? You know, can I say that my child has just like seen his IEP?

 

00:03:18:16 - 00:03:42:20

Unknown

No. Do I have to yell and scream to get it put in? Yes. Do some of the teachers say, oh, well, he doesn't seem like there's anything wrong with him. What? What does that fucking mean? That's awful. And that's that's kind of my, I don't know if grief is the right word. You know, with Dyslexia Awareness Month, you know, you could say gruff.

 

00:03:42:22 - 00:04:23:15

Unknown

It's the girl who who picked it, who picked October. But just because we say it's just like, what's the next step? Where is the next step? There's never been a next step. You know, there's still not going to be an next step. So you have all these people that are, the dyslexic world are just itching for this month because 99% of them are all now bad people trying to do, you know, you know, for their own agendas, not for the kids.

 

00:04:23:17 - 00:04:48:17

Unknown

And so they think they could just look at a job for 31 days of and keep promoting their, their business. Not kids, not the kid in the chair not helping their business. I'm the dyslexic tutor or this or that or that or whatever, you know, and I run the this foundation. We do this. I Dyslexia Awareness Month brings out a lot of pride in people.

 

00:04:48:19 - 00:05:20:13

Unknown

That's kind of where I have a hard time with it. Nobody's calling each other. Hey, let's, let's let's do this event or let's let's do this event or hey, let's let's do something together like this. It's never, you know, a two way street. And one of the things you just brought up a really good point because it was interesting, I was doing I was, I was thinking about this because I was doing a post for the Sopel Foundation and it was about the kid in the chair, because obviously that's what we know the foundation is all about.

 

00:05:20:13 - 00:05:47:06

Unknown

It's about the kid in the chair. There's nothing else. If something helps the kid in the chair, we will do it. If it does not help the kid in the chair, we're not jumping on it. And that's, you know, that has come from, you know, directly from you. And I think one of the things and it's it's really important, I think one of the things that I was thinking about is, as I put the the kid in the chair post up and then was looking at other people's dyslexic awareness posts.

 

00:05:47:10 - 00:06:07:19

Unknown

Yeah, a lot of them are about the positives. And we've talked about this many, many times throughout. But I think what is really important is that it's like when you're so distracted or you give it a go, it's, you know, little sex or she gets at your little salt stick. What does it mean to change it in the other room?

 

00:06:07:19 - 00:06:29:08

Unknown

And oh, she wants to be right here, I said, so she can see you might hear some salt and in the background. That's okay. Well, that's not Elizabeth. That's totally fine. I can't hear anything. But that's the thing that, you know, from the start of the podcast and we're going to bring it up, is that you're not negative.

 

00:06:29:10 - 00:06:52:17

Unknown

Someone might say that you are. I mean, okay, listen, sometimes you have some negative stuff that you say, but it's not typically coming from a negative, angry place. It's coming from a real place. And I throw the word in her place most times for, you know, if he was hurt personally or hurt our nation or hurt another kid or, you know, a lot of that.

 

00:06:52:19 - 00:07:22:00

Unknown

Right. And and so I think that that's really important that we mention that often because it could come across that it's more negative. And anyone that, you know knows me, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm sunshine rainbows. I, I don't yeah I am and I can my personality is I can find the good in everything and I literally can even some of the worst things I can find and I it's again.

 

00:07:22:01 - 00:07:42:03

Unknown

Yeah. How can you sound good in your dyslexia? You know, I can, but I, I could before I mean, I used to to go. Yeah. Sometimes my dyslexia is annoying, but there's some things that I'm like, if I wasn't dyslexic, I would not I wouldn't be able to speak in connection with the people the way I do. I really don't, you know, I wouldn't have the awareness of other people and the empathy.

 

00:07:42:03 - 00:08:14:00

Unknown

I don't think, in the same way that I do. And also the bullshit meter. Right? I mean, I don't think I would have any of that without my dyslexia. No, it's people ask questions for me. Obviously, we're kind of going off for a while. Is this oh, your dyslexia got you to a 100%, you know, my spatial awareness and, about the, you know, anticipating, you know, so yeah, but, you know, at what cost to to get me there right.

 

00:08:14:01 - 00:08:37:15

Unknown

You know, so, you know, it's dyslexia can be a gift. And that's what we talk about. We focus in the kid on the chair. If we can make it, make each kid, Comfortable, be okay with who they are. And, you know, if you do that, every ounce comes along, you're bringing all your gifts come up, you know, if we can do that, then we succeeded.

 

00:08:37:17 - 00:08:59:04

Unknown

And that's the difference. And I think with the post, one of the things that I was putting up was really about like, if you see someone struggling, just assume, assume, oh, it's a summer birthday. They're just a little behind or oh, they might not be that smart or all of these different things that as a, as an education, that's what you're taught to do.

 

00:08:59:04 - 00:09:22:05

Unknown

And so it's not that it's anyone's doing anything that like being malicious on purpose, but for the most part, but if you see someone struggling over and over again or even like we've talked about, if you're the gym teacher and you know, Sarah goes to the left every single time you say right, like, just pause. Because that could be something that's like, you know what?

 

00:09:22:06 - 00:09:43:10

Unknown

Let me just see is this kid trying harder than than they need to. And we've talked about this with all three of my kids. I mean, it's it it's crazy to me that two of my kids weren't diagnosed with dyslexia, not dyslexia, but dysgraphia and dyscalculia until they were in high school, until they started taking the AP classes that were harder.

 

00:09:43:16 - 00:10:02:15

Unknown

And then it was like, well, wait a second, why are you working so hard? I'm so confused. Like, are we trying to get 101? You should be sleep, but you're up until four in the morning doing it, and all of a sudden it was like this light bulb went off. And if I wasn't doing the work with you, even though I know this world inside and out, I wouldn't have thought about it in the same way.

 

00:10:02:17 - 00:10:18:21

Unknown

Well, that's you know, obviously we always think of things differently than everybody else. People always say, oh, I would have never thought about that. You know, obviously that's the famous line when I'm, I'm talking about something like, oh, I would have never thought about that way. Well, you know, obviously pretty tough too, when your brain's not wired that way.

 

00:10:18:21 - 00:10:43:04

Unknown

And so you're not going to see it. We had a little run in last week with you know somebody at the facility with her dad. You know I've, she's like I've been working here for 28 years and I know best I'm like, oh it sounded like a teacher right, right. It's you know obviously we walked out of there and a bunch.

 

00:10:43:06 - 00:11:04:00

Unknown

Yeah, yeah, you probably got. Yeah. Cool. But it was a remind me of a teacher. Did it tweak? You know it was already tweak on it. And please teach me for a couple weeks she's like, I'm biting my tongue because you're saying, oh, somebody is getting me more now. But you know, because I know where. So she's our case manager for, you know.

 

00:11:04:06 - 00:11:26:06

Unknown

Yeah. So if I go and burn the bridges that might that's going to affect him. So I'm biting my tongue. So I had to leave the first day. Elizabeth does a great job keeping her calm with her, but it was this lady said, I've been working in this industry for 28 years. She didn't say our next round young.

 

00:11:26:08 - 00:11:48:18

Unknown

We said, oh, we're supposed to what's get released in a week? You know what a step two and three. Four. She goes one in a week in our time is a long time. 3 or 4 days in our world is a long time. All right. Look at each other go. Okay. How did we know that? Now let's bring it back to, you know, just like, this is new for parents.

 

00:11:48:20 - 00:12:10:00

Unknown

I mean, you've been doing it for 28 years. Great. We're here our first time, right? So, you know, a teacher or principal especially. Let's have some of compassion. Oh, I'm not an expert. I just found out. What the fuck? I'm sorry I got a kid like. So you was. Exactly. And I walked out of there hot, like,

 

00:12:10:01 - 00:12:31:15

Unknown

I want to take this woman and throw her on the third floor, and I will gladly wave on her way down. You know, because that's how frustrated I was. Yeah. This isn't. You know her? Oh, this is her dad hitting on her mom. They're sitting there doing her. I can kind of remove myself a little bit. You know, that's obviously I'm good at doing that anyway.

 

00:12:31:15 - 00:13:00:21

Unknown

So I'm dissecting things a little bit more there. But just as a parent should never go through the IEP meeting that, you know, here in the medical world, they shouldn't be there right. And just because and you know so obviously she's not us right. I've been doing this 20 year I know best okay. You're right. But the people you're talking to who have never been in this situation for so you shouldn't we how do we supposed to know that, three days.

 

00:13:00:21 - 00:13:25:12

Unknown

3 or 4 days is a long time. You're not. We've never been in this world. We're doing this world. It's hard to have compassion, right? Teachers, superintendents will, special a teacher. Like, where is that? It's a number. You're a number. There's not a heart in it, right? No, it's that's, you know, and that's where people pray on in this dyslexic world.

 

00:13:25:14 - 00:13:35:04

Unknown

There's some good people trying to do some great thing 100%, no question. But there's, very few.

 

00:13:35:06 - 00:14:10:05

Unknown

That are there for the kids that you're. And that's why, you know, it's, you know, I mean, you know, it's like you want to like how, you know, what we can do for Dyslexia Awareness Month. I'm I know, well, it's it doesn't get the proper. Spotlight on the wrong people are leading them and that's. You know tough and still you know is that going to be the kid in the chair.

 

00:14:10:07 - 00:14:31:02

Unknown

So you know it's great. We talk about it. You know we'll we'll continue to talk about it this month. Right. But I don't want to put a huge campaign or whatever it that should be for us all year round ever. All the time. Exactly. And I know that and I know you feel like that. But I also am like, well, we're going to do it from the sober foundation and, and.

 

00:14:31:04 - 00:14:45:16

Unknown

Yeah. And and I know you do. You know, it's just, you know, not putting the, you know, because how many people watch you'll see. Oh you don't you haven't done anything for a long time. Now we're going to pop back up and let me, you know, let me grab the momentum. Let me, you know. Yeah. Let me feel it.

 

00:14:45:16 - 00:15:07:03

Unknown

Right, right. Let me let me feel like I'm doing something and I can do it on this month because this is when it's recognize that. No you you. And that's the thing where again, when I'm saying the negative or the positive, like you bring very real information to the surface that others some whether they know they're doing it or not, right?

 

00:15:07:03 - 00:15:29:11

Unknown

They're like, fuck, I did that. I mean, you know, we've all guilty at times. We're like, shit, I didn't think about that. And you see something pop up and you're like, you know, or someone's talking about something and you're like, oh, I, you know, I didn't do anything, but this is where I think it's really important. And this is where I think a lot of times dyslexia is put on the on the backburner because people don't think it's as serious as it is.

 

00:15:29:11 - 00:15:50:14

Unknown

They don't think, oh, wait. Okay. So it's like I mean, listen, we have all done it for something, right? And like we're it's like someone's talking about it in your in your head. You might be like, oh, okay. Well you know, it's that's, that's a, that's a sad story or oh okay, I get it. But it doesn't because it's not impacting you directly.

 

00:15:50:16 - 00:16:10:02

Unknown

That's just human nature. But so I think so many people that are not impacted directly or don't think they're impacted because there's, there's so many people that we talk to them, they're like, oh shit. Like, right. I stuffed that or I didn't want to talk about that or I, you know, I got through school and I wasn't thinking about it.

 

00:16:10:04 - 00:16:31:11

Unknown

But that's where it's so important that, you know, that people that are in the dyslexic world, you know, you have to remember who you're putting your eggs and who's basket because you don't know what the intent are on the back end. You don't know what their thoughts are, what their intentions are, what they're doing, what they're pushing.

 

00:16:31:13 - 00:16:46:02

Unknown

And so you have to do your homework on it and it's it can be overwhelming. I mean, we know that it can be very overwhelming. Well, there's it is overwhelming because there's a lot to it. Right. And.

 

00:16:46:04 - 00:17:08:23

Unknown

You know, how many people, you know, that doesn't say they're dyslexic, but we, you know, we've been around them long, you know, long enough. They have they want to be part of it. They don't don't have the full understanding of of of what it is. And the hard part is, you know, that's why, you know, a kid always when they're want to skip school and it's a tummy ache.

 

00:17:09:01 - 00:17:31:23

Unknown

Right. Or it's a headache. Why. Because you can't see right. You can't say I broke my, my my response. They know how you did. Right. So, Now they're, they're, they're, they're smart. You know to be able to hide things. Right. But that's a brain. That's a stomach. Right. Nobody can get in there and see. Let me, let me peek in there.

 

00:17:32:01 - 00:17:57:18

Unknown

You know there's a lot of nuances. It goes to dyslexia. And that's why it's easy to tell who. Don't doesn't have it because how they lead and how they speak is different than somebody who does. The other thing is that you just said that's a really a lot of times the kid in the beginning doesn't realize why their stomach hurts.

 

00:17:57:18 - 00:18:15:06

Unknown

Right. And it's it's anxiety. It's anxiety. And it goes to their stomach. There's I can go very Woo-Hoo. And I'm not going to but some of us well I'm going to I want to touch on that a little bit. I was not going to you know I have to and he don't regret. One of the things is all of us feel in different ways.

 

00:18:15:06 - 00:18:34:12

Unknown

Some of us are more guttural. So we like, think our emotions are more in our gut. Some of us are more in our heart, so our emotions are more in our heart. Some of us are more in our head and, and, and we're built that way. So sometimes a kid could also say like, my heart's bothering me, or like I'm skipping a beat or all these different things.

 

00:18:34:12 - 00:18:51:01

Unknown

Like if a child seems like they're very in tuned to something that's going on, just pause. And sometimes it's exhausting. I was that kid that was very aware of everything that was going on, but I also didn't love school, so I would I think this is happening to me like, I think we need to go to the doctor and get it checked out, you know?

 

00:18:51:01 - 00:19:21:16

Unknown

And it I remember my mom saying, like, there were times like in the beginning you were like, okay, well, I kind of have to, but like, what is this? And it was me being very completely in tune. So you're going to have a kid that comes and says either they have a stomach ache or they have a headache or something is bothering them, and that usually means they're now aware, because in the beginning you're not aware as a child, you're not aware that you're struggling until all of a sudden it's like, this is really hard and you don't know that.

 

00:19:21:18 - 00:19:43:01

Unknown

You know, maybe especially in the younger grades, like what kids are doing things, but then all of a sudden, you know, like your kid will say, do you know that Johnny was in you know, level F in reading and your child brings that up like 3 or 4 times. It's bothering them. It's bothering them that they're at a different level and they don't know how to express it.

 

00:19:43:01 - 00:20:03:23

Unknown

They don't know what to talk about. But that's like so important. If your child does a comparison thing in school sometimes and does like dig in a little bit, especially if you have dyslexia in your world, in your family, or if you are like, you know, I am not the best speller, but I got by right? And you don't think that you are just.

 

00:20:04:01 - 00:20:24:05

Unknown

Or like Johnny's going to the nurse all the time. There is a fucking reason and it's and it's not. I hate so much when it's like, oh, it's just because they're antsy or they're r boy, or they don't want to sit still or they don't like to do directions, or they don't like this, they don't like that. Why there is a fucking reason.

 

00:20:24:07 - 00:21:04:09

Unknown

Oh school's not easy for everybody. Now. I'm like oh it's my life. Life isn't easy. But then going to somewhere where you're not, you're struggling for eight hours. Isn't is is new isn't Uber fun right. And it's it's not and it's it's just just to be aware of it and to think about it and not just even in our busy ways as parents, sometimes we don't have time to listen because we're all going in different ways.

 

00:21:04:09 - 00:21:27:20

Unknown

And I know so many parents that are in not the best spaces right now, and that means that their your kids are not going to be in the best spaces and it's no judgment, no whatever on anyone. But just, you know, just listen a little bit more. If that kid especially were in October. So, you know, some kids have been going to school for two months, some one, some three.

 

00:21:27:22 - 00:21:39:04

Unknown

This is when things start getting hard. It might. Malik's favorite, holidays coming up. How?

 

00:21:39:06 - 00:22:09:08

Unknown

To where do they. Where would you or you want to James Jackson. No, no, I. He just wanted to throw random. I know it is. What are you talking about? October. Yeah. Which is your favorite holiday? Oh. Oh, hang on. Grandma had the best find she's ever had. It's always been two years. Best fine ever. Is this the candy?

 

00:22:09:10 - 00:22:34:04

Unknown

I do? I mean, I mean balls now with no wrappers, just in a bag. Yeah. So for baking, for eating. So you don't have to wrap, unwrap all the wrappers. Best fine ever you did on your dyslexic baking doesn't it doesn't make the holiday a holiday baking because I open it up and I'm 11. Right? But I don't have to fight with plastic.

 

00:22:34:09 - 00:23:02:02

Unknown

The best find ever. Haha. Standing ovation for she came on. I'm like, where did you find this? It's you talks about it on your, right on your video. Your it was because I was driving right through, grocery store to make my, my loop with my donut, but that's the the best find yet. Oh, I forgot to look.

 

00:23:02:04 - 00:23:29:12

Unknown

Oh, I don't I heard a donut. Is somebody you stuck? Yes. My shell is two red bulls and a chocolate long John. Oh, talk about diabetes, I don't I so what? I had too much sugar this weekend, and I would you have a real sugar? I have one real sugar. Pure cup. Oh my goodness. Oh right. Oh, I used to have too much.

 

00:23:29:12 - 00:23:52:00

Unknown

No, no, it killed my arthritis, my hands and my arthritis. Nothing to do with. You were moving stuff. This was before, motherfucker. This is before I moved stuff. And I woke up and my arthritis. And it hasn't been that bad. No. Trust me, I used to down honey bears. I used to eat brown sugar. I used tiny bears.

 

00:23:52:02 - 00:24:14:13

Unknown

Honey, you know, like the honey that. Yeah. Which comes in a bear. Yeah. I used to just. I could eat pure honey and, like, I would down like that would be. Oh, rebel. Oh, shut up. And I, you see, I you see that it's that when. Yeah. Your your on your Subaru to. I never drove a Subaru.

 

00:24:14:15 - 00:24:31:15

Unknown

It's a Volkswagen did you. Where the TiVo is a Tesla. So now I did not. And you talked about this I did not weird TiVo and I'm a little crunchy but no not that surprised. You're not up in California.

 

00:24:31:17 - 00:24:50:01

Unknown

Because I like the environment and I like to do things, and I like yoga and that kind of stuff. And I. You seen tons. We've talked about this fun dip or my favorite. And I loved the fun dipstick. That was like, I would take everyone's fun dipstick. Like they would be like, oh, this is too sugary. Any cake?

 

00:24:50:01 - 00:25:12:10

Unknown

I would only eat the icing. No. And then one day it was like, guess what, you can't do that anymore. And so I had to stop. I'll just leave it at that. So the caramel sound wonderful. I'm so glad we're out. So, we're gonna have to get a couple. Okay. So she's eating like, a bag. Two bags a week.

 

00:25:12:12 - 00:25:35:10

Unknown

She has all the cookies she's baking. Or is there someone else? A cookie monster coming in before. I think that would be you. So clearly our attention deficit is, in wonderful mode, but just a lot of things to think about. And we've asked all like, you know, are you asking questions this month in dyslexia awareness? But ask the right question.

 

00:25:35:10 - 00:25:56:00

Unknown

Don't make someone dyslexia feel, especially if they're not okay with their dyslexia. They're not going to love your question. So be aware. Self-awareness, self awareness. Do you have anything else you would like to add? Just like you're never with your self awareness. That's perfect. Well, we're just gonna say like write, review and share, you know two share.

 

00:25:56:00 - 00:26:02:03

Unknown

Always share. And we'll see you for another episode of Word Blindness. Just like the experts.