Episode 192: Overcoming Challenges with Dr. Miriam Zylberglait - Family, Career, and Fulfillment

May 03, 2023

Dr. Miriam Zylberglait Lisigurski (Dr. Z) is a triple Board Certified Physician in Internal Medicine, Geriatrics, and Obesity Medicine with extensive clinical and academic experience. Dr. Z is interested in the areas of well-being, burnout, mental health, and leadership development.

She completed a fellowship in Leadership Education and Development (AAMC), certification as Mental Health Ally, and training as Physician Wellness Advocate. Dr. Z has been recognized for multiple achievements, including Mentor of the Year (AMWA 2021) and American College of Physicians Young Achiever (2017).

Originally from Peru, Dr. Z has two awesome sons, a caring husband, and a supportive family. Her dream is to help others achieve lives full of joy, meaning, and well-being.

 

You can find Dr. Z on LinkedIn and check out her book on her Website and on Amazon.

 

Remarkable Quote:

 

“You cannot do these things alone. You need your family, you need your friends, you need support because this is not a marathon that you will be able to run by yourself.”

 

Find Us Online!

Transcription:

00:00:00 Welcome back to your next stop. In this episode, I speak with Miriam Zylberglait. I hope I said that right, Miriam? Dr. Z.

00:00:08 So you guys, Miriam is Peruvian, now resides in Miami. She is a physician by Treat. And this story is so beautiful. Miriam is a best selling author. Her book is the 3g Cycle of life.

00:00:24 You can actually find that on three gCycle li V E. And you can also find Miriam on LinkedIn. And her last name is Z-Y-L-B-E-R-G-L-A-I-T-I hope I did that right. Dr. Z.

00:00:39 This story is I mean, we laughed, we cried. It is a beautiful story. Miriam, where she was as a physician, as a Peruvian woman, to then what kind of established and what played out when her mother became ill. And it wasn't known because they were separated because of COVID And then what came out of this story is just absolutely beautiful. And her book is something that you guys do not want to miss.

00:01:06 It is the secrets of achieving joy, meaning and well being. And this is coming from a physician who was top of her class when she went to Miami, had to study again, is really well known in her field. And she realized that something needed to give after COVID, that she was just working, working. And it is a beautiful, beautiful story. So you do not want to miss it again, you can find Miriam on LinkedIn and you can also find her book, the 3G Cycle of Life.

00:01:38 And that is again, three gCycle li V E. You do not want to miss it. And we'll see you guys for next episode of Your Next Stop.

00:01:50 Welcome to your next stop. I say this every single time, but I can't help myself. I'm so excited to bring you someone that has followed a passion. Now you know how I pronounce things. So I'm going to introduce Miriam and I'm going to have you say your last name.

00:02:04 Welcome. Thank you so much for having me. Silver glade. But if you're Dr. C or Miriam.

00:02:10 Whatever is good, right? And so we're going to spell that for you guys. And you're also going to see it in the show notes. But Miriam is a doctor by trade, but she has also written the most beautiful book. And that's what we're going to get into her story.

00:02:24 But we're also going to touch on the book and the importance of it. So, Miriam, I'm so excited to dive in. I know when we connected on LinkedIn, we then had a conversation and I think we always say it's going to be 15 minutes. And we definitely went way longer than that because I just love what you're doing. And really what you're doing is bringing your passion and sharing it with others.

00:02:47 And so I really appreciate it. I want everyone to be able to follow you on LinkedIn and then also the website. So three gCycle live and that's live. And then you can find Miriam on LinkedIn is where she hangs out the most. And it's Dr.

00:03:01 Z again. And that's Miriam and then the last name. And I think I'm going to spell it zielberg Lake. Oh, I just said it. Okay.

00:03:11 Zielberg Lake. You did. That perfect. So it's Z-Y-L-B-E-R-G-L-A-I-T. So you can find Dr.

00:03:19 Z Miriam over there. So, Miriam, I would love just to dive in a little bit about your background, where you grew up, and a little bit about as you went into the university and then obviously becoming a doctor. So even my last name will not help you. Guess where I'm from. I am Peruvian.

00:03:41 Where Machu Picchu cusco is and the ceviche that is so famous now here, even in the US. I grew up there. Small family. My dad worked very hard to provide us with education. He told us that that's what he can give us so we will be able to achieve our dreams.

00:04:02 And that's exactly what we got from my parents, education and love. I decided to go to study medicine for wrong reasons. I wanted to save people and help people and change the world. But I used to faint with blood, and I am still very afraid of needles. But my best friend wanted to go to medical school, and she convinced me to go from psychology to psychiatry.

00:04:28 And I said yes. Why not? I will use a white coat. Everybody will call me doctor. So it was a yes from me, it was a no from my parents.

00:04:38 So it took me a lot of effort and an experiment with a doctor taking me to the or to expose me to a C section to discover that I really love this. I didn't fade. It was amazing. My friend never went to go to medical school. She changed her mind before that, and she ended up being a business lady.

00:05:04 And I was stuck. I was like, I cannot do anything more. And that's how I started. Just good luck. Right?

00:05:12 That's amazing. Now, why did your parents kind of say no? They didn't want you to be because they knew about the fainting or what was also some of their trepidation. So they knew about the fainting. It was not very common for a woman to go to medical school.

00:05:27 I come from a traditional home where women are supposed to get married and have kids and, yes, have a profession, but that's not a priority. And medicine is the extreme, the opposite extreme of that. Very expensive, for sure, especially if you will quit the first semester.

00:05:46 And I was very emotional, too. And I believe that my parents, especially my dad, took that in consideration. I was very emotional. Since I was a kid, I used to embrace and empathize with others, and things affected me. So, yeah, I discovered that very soon.

00:06:10 Crying with patients here and there in a very embarrassing way. But yeah, that was me. That is true in some way, me. Well, I'm an empath too. I mean, I feel and I feel other people's pain.

00:06:25 And sometimes as much as it is a beautiful thing, other times it's exhausting. Right? Because sometimes you're like, oh, I just wish I didn't feel everyone else's pain and feel like I want to fix it or help or I can sympathize with them. So going into the medical field, that has to be like, you're going to come up against some hard things, you're going to come up with some emotional things. And I think that makes you just a real person.

00:06:48 And I wonder, and I think you can answer this, some of your patients might have felt closer and more bonded to you because you were real and they saw if you got emotional. Yes, I believe that my best relationships were created from tough situations where my patients or their family members saw me suffering with them. Let me remind you, the culture in Peru is very different than here in Peru. A doctor is part of the family. I used to hack my patients.

00:07:24 They will come my house and speak with my mom. If Miriam there, I need her. Like my dad is having high blood pressure, right. So my mom will know my patients even, at least my farm. So the culture was very different and it was very easy to get attached.

00:07:41 I have a story. I am here in the US for eleven years. My first patient, my first private patient, I met him around 20 years ago when I was starting as a physician. And I received just recently a video of his birthday party. He's now 96 or 97 dancing.

00:08:05 And the doctors that are in touch with me, even I am not in Peru and I am not the doctor anymore of the family. They send me that video so I can celebrate with them. And that is vitamin for your soul. I cannot describe that feeling. Amazing.

00:08:24 Oh, that is amazing. And I love that. And I love that in your culture that that was something important. And you saw that. I think it's really important.

00:08:31 So then where did you go on? When did you then relocate to the US? So I relocated eleven years ago. And it was a very romantic story. I came for vacations to be with he was my boyfriend at the time.

00:08:50 We were dating back and forth, Miami, Lima. And I never went back to Peru. He proposed, we got married, I quit my job in Skype and I decided to start from zero. Very crazy story. I decided to start from zero here.

00:09:13 And probably the reason why I did it. I know that sounds very crazy for someone that is an adult, mature, a professional. But the last month my patients were asking me again and again, if I am dating someone, if I am getting married, if I have kids, like when you are a geriatrician, your patients could be not only your parents, but your grandparents. And they consider you part of the family. So they will ask, right?

00:09:41 And this couple that I knew for ten years, very old couple, together for 60 years, they were together for 60 years. Very romantic. Walking together with the holding hands. They asked me again and I answered the same. I am a doctor, I am busy, I am planning this, I am planning that.

00:10:01 And they told me, do you understand that we love you? But when we go home, we go back to our families. And the nurses and your students, they also go back to their families. Who are you going back to? Like, who is waiting for you?

00:10:17 And I was like, okay, that's not very nice, right? They show me my white coat and they told me, this thing that you are using is just a clothes. This is what you use. This is not your skin. You are a woman.

00:10:36 You are not a doctor. You work as a doctor. And that really wow, pushed me to my next level and my romantic story. Right? What did that feel?

00:10:50 I mean, I know because America, it's so different, but in your culture, it was important, right? You get married, you have your family, your family's, everything. And so for you to hear from this couple, like, what do you have to go home to? That had to sing a little bit. Oh my God.

00:11:05 Was painful in many ways because again, I was the nontypical Peruvian Jewish girl there, right? I mean, all my friends were already married with kids and I was planning my next adventure. What conference? What that? So, yes, my parents, they were very respectful, I need to admit.

00:11:28 I need to give them credit. They didn't torture me too much. They try, but they were respectful. But yeah, it gets to a point that even I was never very obsessive about having kids. I wanted to share my life with someone.

00:11:47 I was not sure about the kids part, but I knew that I wanted to share my life with someone. And really Alex came in the right moment and was the right person and everything, you know, the pieces of the puzzle. And I did something very crazy. I jumped it in a pool and thank God there was water. And eleven years later, almost twelve years later, we are married with two beautiful kids.

00:12:15 And I was able to be a physician here. So I guess it was not such a great idea, right? So how did that look? I know we don't have to dive into too much of it, but my listeners know I have to ask questions that come to my mind. Where did you and Alex, where did you guys meet?

00:12:33 My sister used to live here. So I was going back and forth and it was just social event and randomly. And one month later, he was in Peru visiting my parish. Wow, that's amazing. Now, what nationality is because your last name is right.

00:12:49 It's not Peruvian. What is his nationality? So he's argentinian. He came from Argentina. And the times that the government was not good there, escaping Argentina for safety reasons to the US.

00:13:04 To La. When he was 14. So he's kind of half laughing and half American. I always say that he has the best of both World War, but yeah, has been great to have someone that grew up here and that was more that was more adaptive. It helped me to adapt to the new system and the new culture.

00:13:32 Right. No, it's true. And so now when you met him and you decided, okay, this is it, was it easy to then did you have to get a degree in the US. If you could take us through a little bit of that how you decided, because you being a doctor was obviously really ingrained in you and you wanted to make your parents proud and continue something that you loved. So how did that look when you decided to stay in the US.

00:13:56 So to be a doctor here, if you come from another country, you have to spend almost a couple of years taking tests, three different tests. Each test lasts like 9 hours, so I don't have to explain how challenging it is. And then you need to go again through the specialty and super specialty. So you need to go back like, I'm a student. So I had faculty that were much younger than me, and they were my faculty.

00:14:26 So I needed to learn a few things. I needed to learn that I need to separate any little piece of ego from myself and put it in a box, because whatever I was in Peru is not reality here. So I am at the level of anybody else. And I needed to accept that. The second thing that I needed to accept is that this is medicine.

00:14:53 So who cares? I am an intern. I am a student. I will be with patients. I will be doing what I love to do.

00:15:01 So that helped a lot with the ego issue. So that was kind of my way to cope. And then I did it with a belly during the three years I got pregnant, the first year when I was doing 30 hours calls. And then I got pregnant during my fellowship and I was breast pumping in the middle of the hospital or while driving. Not safe.

00:15:31 Don't do it. I had to drive 1 hour, so I didn't have a choice. And what I learned from that is that you cannot do these things alone. You need your family, you need your friends. If you have a good husband, you need support because this is not a marathon that you will be able to run by yourself.

00:15:52 This is teamwork, and that's important because I know that there's so many women out there that have the career and have the family. And I talk about this on the podcast occasionally. There was a time, especially when I was having kids, it was like, women could do it all, and I believe we could do it all, but not all at once. And I knew for myself when I was going to go back, I knew I always wanted to be a mom. So going back, I did really toy with it.

00:16:20 And the reason why I did is because I was like, I feel like a little bit of a failure that I have all these opportunities women before me have put all this effort in, and then I'm choosing not to. But I had this really great conversation with my sister, and she asked me one question what will make you the best mom and wife? And I didn't even stop. I said, oh, to stay home. And she goes, well, why are you going back and forth?

00:16:40 I worked in alternative advertising, and my hours were crazy. I would be traveling everywhere, and I knew that work and my son would get most of me. And then my husband was going to really not get a lot. And I just said, I know myself. I'm all or nothing.

00:16:57 I'm not going to be really great at splitting it. And I was okay. I wasn't putting myself down. I knew that what I did in my career wasn't going to look the same if I did that. So I think it's important for women to hear what you said, because you were achieving a very high level, right?

00:17:14 You're a doctor, and now you have to retake your test to be in the US. Which, again, I love that you said you had to take your ego out, because I think I would have been pissed. I would have been like, Wait a second. Why?

00:17:28 Actually, I can tell you that the second time that I went through the training was better than the first time. I was relaxed because I knew medicine. You were not teaching me medicine. What you were teaching me is the system. So while somewhere struggling just to say hello to the patient, right?

00:17:49 For me, that was like, I have been doing this for ten years. I need to learn the system. I need to get the new guidelines. I need to be better in what I am doing, more efficient.

00:18:03 This was really an opportunity for me to grow in a different level and to enjoy it. I was able to enjoy it. Let me tell you, having the babies inside of me, kicking, and a lot of people will think that I am crazy, was wonderful. I was never alone. It's like 03:00 a.m.

00:18:25 In the morning. You are not alone in the ICU. You have someone there moving and jumping with the noise. And I really worked until the last minute. I was on call with Ari, my little one with two payers.

00:18:41 They used to give us payers. Right. We don't use that anymore, I guess. And I started to feel that something is happening. I was supposed to deliver in a different hospital 30 minutes away from where I work.

00:18:55 So my husband took me there, and I am with the pagers on call, and someone from my hospital had to go to the hospital where I was to pick up the call, the pagers, so I can go and have my baby. So technically, till the last second, I work. And you know what? No problem. It was okay.

00:19:17 Actually, I can laugh about that today, and it will be the story for my kids. Well, that's a beautiful thing. And it's also, again, you knew your limits. And I love that you kind of painted that picture, that it was fun for you to go back, because it was like you weren't learning what you learned. You already had that.

00:19:32 But it was the systems of how to do something different. So I love that you said that. So then from there, you raised your family, you had your kids, and then I know COVID happened. How many years were you in the US. When COVID happened?

00:19:46 So I was for probably nine years. Eight. Nine years. Okay. Eight years, yeah.

00:19:54 And so you were already established. You had, from what you said, really great relationship with your parents, and now your sister still lived in the States, is that correct? Yes. And my parents are alone there. And your parents are alone.

00:20:07 Right. And so what did that I know you shared a story with me. If you can share the story of I think you were supposed to be going back or your parents were supposed to be coming to visit you guys, and then if you could take us through that a little bit. So my parents actually were at home with me in Florida, in Miami, and I was really trying to convince them to stay. I wanted all of my friends to be with me.

00:20:33 We are only two sisters, and they don't have more family. And I grew up thinking that you have to be with your family, but maybe the English or they don't speak who knows what. They always had a good reason to say no, and this time they were at home, and they flied back to Lima just one week before everything was closed. And I was so mortified and upset. Like, timing was not good.

00:21:06 And then two years without seeing them, and it was very difficult. It was scary, especially because my dad is the best friend of my mom, meaning that they are partners in crime, so they will not share information. They will cover themselves. And we were afraid of what is happening there. How are they doing?

00:21:32 Are they eating? Are they okay? And even we were talking two, three times per day, each of us, my sister and I. So you can duplicate that. It was very scary.

00:21:46 It was scary. We didn't know if we will see them again. Right. And you're still practicing. I was not inside of the hospital.

00:21:56 I am in the outpatient. So I didn't see what many of my friends and many of my residents, my students were exposed to. Big difference of what I saw. But I was exposed in a different way in the outpatient, trying to prevent people to get sick enough to go to the hospital. So I was not able to see my kids and my husband for several months.

00:22:24 Like, I was living in a space in the house without contact with them.

00:22:31 And my kids were scared. They saw that I will die like many other kids, I guess, with parents. Because how old were your were your kids at this time? Five and seven. We started at five.

00:22:46 Yeah. So so they were little and so like that's the thing, I think that age for a lot of kids, obviously it was a very unknown for all of us. But when you are little and you can't kind of process what's going on and then not having you around and then you worrying about, I'm sure your immediate family and then also wearing about your parents was a lot of pressure. And then worrying about your patients, because we learned from the beginning of this episode you're an empath, right. You feel you feel deeply for people.

00:23:18 And so having all of that stress on you. My residents you will not believe that my residents were probably one of my biggest concerns because when you talk about that resident, many individuals that are far away from medical field they may not understand arrested is really a young physician that is traveling from any place of the world or the country to be for three, five, six years in a place almost by himself, working and with a very low salary, very poor support. And suddenly this happens. And they were working, they were not removed from the action, let's call it like that. They were there, scared like crazy, stress like crazy.

00:24:05 And very I will say that not necessarily emotionally prepared to go through all that, like many of us, of course. So I was very concerned about their well being in some way. When you have residents. Well, when I have residents or students, they are my kids. I am mommy at work, so it's not scary.

00:24:30 It was sad to see them suffering. Yeah, no, and I appreciate you giving us some a little bit of insight into that because right, it was and I like to say now, because I don't like to give COVID anymore. Now we've moved past and life is different. But when you started coming out of COVID when was the first time that you were able to see your parents, and what did that look like? So almost really two years later, I traveled to Peru.

00:24:57 I was super happy. My expectations were I was not expected something wrong. I was expecting that they will be okay, probably older, and the house will not be super clean and things will yeah, they were taking care of themselves. So I expected little things here and there, but I didn't know exactly what was waiting for me. And the truth is that when I went home, I entered the house, and my mom didn't recognize me.

00:25:33 I am a geriatrician. I mean, I am an expert in cognitive impairment. I catch the fact that my mom was not talking very much with me, that she was avoiding me. I saw that she was depressed. I saw that she was upset.

00:25:50 I saw so many things I didn't see through a camera and a few minutes of connection while I was typing or checking my phone or doing multitasking, even about to my kids.

00:26:09 I was not present enough to see the red flag, and then the red flag was there, and my mom was not able to recognize me. And I cannot go back on time and revert that process, and I can use that only as an opportunity to change what I am doing wrong. Even I didn't do it because of bad reasons. But you don't need to be a bad person to do things that are not good, right? And that's important.

00:26:44 We can make mistakes, and we need to be kind with ourselves, compassionate with ourselves. And I'm in that process in trying to change what I did wrong and try to make up for it for my parents, for my husband, for my kids, and for myself. And so just to clarify a little bit is that your mom was having Alzheimer's, dementia, and your dad, as you said in the beginning, was covering it up. And so when you got there, and then all of a sudden it realized you went back and were like, why didn't I see this? I'm a doctor.

00:27:20 I'm sure you beat yourself up a lot. I'm a doctor. Why didn't I see this? I can't believe this. And it must have been devastating.

00:27:27 My grandmother had dementia. I actually had one of my best friends have frontal lobe dementia and died by 43, maybe even a little earlier. And it was the first stages of it. Sometimes you don't see because it is again, it's like, okay, is the person depressed? What are they going through?

00:27:43 What else is happening in life? And so you took it very personally because as we've heard throughout this episode, that's what you do, I mean, that's what makes you a fantastic doctor, is because you take things personally. I want to clarify something, and thank you so much for saying that. I appreciate it. But a fantastic doctor needs to have the heart in the right place, but needs to be able to also to set boundaries.

00:28:09 And that was something that I learned in medical school. And it took a lot of effort and tears from me because you need to be as close as possible to care and to do your best, but as far away as possible to don't allow those feelings to interfere with your correct judgment. And I always say I do not accept or I do not take or I do not have VIP patients. VIP patients are the ones that get complicated. You don't do things different for anybody because you will fail.

00:28:49 So that combinations of being close, but not so close probably is a big challenge that I'm still trying to learn how to do it right. Right. And that's the thing. I mean, I think we all know there's definitely, if you look and categorize an entrepreneur, a doctor, a lawyer, an accountant, all these different things that people do, a salesperson, there is something similar that connects them. There's something personality wise that connects them.

00:29:22 And one of the things about being a teacher, there's so many different things, but that has to be really hard, especially when you're an empath and really feel deeply to be able to separate yourself from the actual of having the feelings. And that is something that takes work for some people, other people, it's just very natural. And that part of being a doctor is easy for them. But maybe there's something else that's a little bit more difficult. So this is what you had to work, this was your journey, this is what you had to strengthen, was kind of separating your patients from you and knowing that you had to give to your family.

00:29:58 But so going in and seeing your mom this way now, did you get angry with your dad?

00:30:06 Yes. Inside of me, yes, a lot. But it was not the time to say anything, and it will never be the time to say anything about that.

00:30:22 I will not change the situation. Blaming others, I need to take the responsibility of what I did and I didn't do. And the rest, they were trying their best under the circumstances. If you see my dad, today is my mom's birthday, by the way, if you see my dad, oh, happy birthday. Thank you.

00:30:46 Holding hands with my mom when they go to sleep, and they sleep holding hands. And he takes so good care of her, and he will ask her 100 times exactly the same question, and he will answer 100 times exactly the same answer with love and respect. Who I will blame for what? It's not needed. And that's the thing.

00:31:18 And I think it's so important for the listeners to hear that because as much as you had the anger, your dad was doing the best that he could. He was protecting this is from my own words, but he was protecting you because there was nothing you could have done. And he also. Knows that you are an empath, that you're someone that would feel deeply and what would that do to you mentally if you knew that your mom had this and there was no help like that. She was starting to develop more signs and more signs, and there was nothing that you could do that could have been a whole different journey that you encountered.

00:31:50 And he knew that probably was going to take you away from what you were doing. It was scary times. He did the best that he knew to do. And so obviously you think about that. And I think that's beautiful that you think about that.

00:32:02 So if you could take us through then your book and how that again, you guys can find that at three gCycle live. How that came about? I know that it's just recently you got published, the books came in the mail. It was really fun to watch again, go to Miriam's LinkedIn, because you can kind of see that because again, you shared with me that that wasn't something that you ever really thought that you were going to do. So take us through that journey a little bit.

00:32:32 So during COVID I saw the pain that COVID caused, but I saw other things. I saw a broken system, a healthcare system that was broken. I saw harassment, lack of respect, abuse in a system that was in survival mode. And I saw the real color and the real faces of individuals. You need to be in good shape.

00:33:01 I'm feeling very good to be politically correct when you're in survival mode, compassion fatigue, attacks. And then suddenly you see reality. And I saw reality. And I was upset. And I started to try to understand done and to look into information.

00:33:22 And I discovered that for hundreds of physicians die by suicide every year in this country before COVID that more than 60% are burnout, more than 30% are depressed. I was terrified. And that was my first article. Where are the leaders? Where is everyone?

00:33:46 I mean, this is happening before COVID This is not getting better now. And I was furious. So I started writing articles and then doing some podcasts. And the opportunity of the book came in front of me on LinkedIn. Thank you so much, LinkedIn.

00:34:04 And I decided to jump into another pool that I don't know if I will find water or not, but they accept me with my accent and my bad English grammar. I have no idea yet why, but they took me and I started a book. And what happened with the book was very interesting, is that this anger and this idea of starting to blame people and institutions of why these things are going wrong and why nobody is doing anything about this was transform, actually in something absolutely. In the other side, in a positive book, where I was not trying to blame, I was trying to find solutions. And that's really the person that I am the very upset person was just a burnout mother, physician, daughter on pain, on severe pain.

00:35:08 And that's not me. So the book helped me really like psychotherapy for sure. And it was free psychotherapy to vent and to find myself again and find my values and to help others at the same time. I love that. So again, guys, it's the 3G cycle of life.

00:35:28 You can find it on Miriam LinkedIn. You can find it, but it's three gCycle. Live, live. And it's such a beautiful journey. And what you're sharing though, people can hear your story.

00:35:43 I talk about this all the time, how stories connect us, right? Your story is going to connect with so many people that have had situations that or right now are sitting there thinking, okay, I have a situation. And so what I love that you also said is that this was kind of psychotherapy for you. It really helped you kind of work through your emotions and your expressions when you started writing it, when was your kind of AHA moment? And it might have been right in the beginning, but when was your AHA moment?

00:36:14 Or if you had one that you were like, this is something, this is really going to help people instead of just helping you. I believe that when I started the interviews, when I interviewed more than 30 different individuals, four different continents, different genders, cultures, careers, ages, all the extremes, like a Buddhist nun and actually a professional athlete, and then we have a Wall Street person that you already met. And all these individuals came with their own stories and their own approaches about how to go through life even during challenges, and not only survive, but really grow and improve themselves. And when I started to collect the stories and merge those stories with mine and collect scientific data and find out that this was valuable, this was something that I am learning from them, why you will not be able to learn from them, right? Or why this will not apply to someone else.

00:37:28 So what I did with the book is to create this opportunity to navigate different type of feelings or situations, which I call catalyst, and to have the stories, which is so important. Stories connect us, but also reflection time and exercise and different techniques that you can apply in your real life. And what I was very careful to do with the book was a couple of things. Number one, the book doesn't have chapters with numbers. So this book is your journey.

00:38:06 I cannot force you to live your life in my way or the way of any of the individuals that I interviewed. This is your life, right? So why you will read the book in the order that I want. You need to look into the chapter that fits you today. You want to talk about love?

00:38:23 Go for it. Maybe fear. Okay? So that's a way to navigate the book in your own way is your own journey. And the second is that it reduces the stress.

00:38:36 A book anti stress should not cause a stress. So you will never feel that you never finish the book because the book doesn't have a beginning and doesn't have an end either. It's just a cycle that goes around the same book is. So this is not a book that you need to finish. It's a book that you have to have next to you and open it when you need it and will be your companion.

00:39:01 And last but not least, I believe that I honor what I learned from this book and the most important lesson that I learned as a workaholic and superhero doctor. And I can do everything that I want, and I don't need to eat and I don't need to stop. And all those crazy things that doctors we believe we can do and are not true. One of the most important is like we don't ask for help, we don't admit that we need help. And I learned that and I learned that from the people that I interview.

00:39:37 And for me they are very valuable and they became, many of them, not only friends but really family. So at the end of the book you will be able to see their pictures, but also to get or the link in the ebook or the barcode in the printed version so you can go see the stories, connect with them and find them and learn directly from them because I want to give them the credit that they deserve. They help me to help others and I want to honor that. I love that. I think it's so beautiful.

00:40:13 So people again, they can find it at three gCycle li. Is it in Amazon bookstores? Is there other places they can find it as well? It's on Amazon. And yes, soothing bookstores too.

00:40:26 Hopefully soon. And a Spanish version, I am working in that too. Wonderful. Yeah, I cannot leave the Spanish on the site. I need to do it.

00:40:40 Oh, that's amazing. I love that. Now, where are your parents now? They are still in Peru. We have cargivers there with him, with them and all the support that they need.

00:40:51 And my sister and I, we travel very often, even for two, three days just to give them a hug and come back. Today we will have a soon party with candles and cake for my mom and we will keep trying to do our best to be present. And I have a story, this is a real story and I believe that it's so important and the reason why I feel less affected by the situation. When I went visit my mom the first time and after realizing what was going on, I tried to cure her, right? Why not?

00:41:33 I mean, optimist. And I gave her some pictures, the albums with lots of pictures from when I was a girl and when she was a girl, so she was going and she was able to recognize in Alzheimer, you can recognize the past better than the present, right? So she was like, oh, my mom and this and my friends and stuff. And at some point, I don't know why, I had this feeling that I need to record this. And I did it.

00:41:59 I start to record and my mommy stopped and she told me, you know what, I had good parents. I didn't behave very well, but they were very good parents. Anyway, she was fired.

00:42:18 And my friend, I had good friends and my husband Carlos, like, he's a good man. What can I say bad about him? He's a good man. And I have two girls, my daughters, they are not here now, but I love them, they love it. They are good daughters.

00:42:38 I am very lucky if I will have to go today. I had a good life. I'm happy that I have that life. I have doubt, ears and the message that my mom gave me. And I don't know for what happened at that moment inside of her and why she said that, but I was focusing on myself.

00:43:04 I was focusing on my pain, what I wanted for her, what I wanted for me, my expectations, my pain, my ego. But I was not thinking about her, what type of life she had and what she needs right now and knowing that she can go today feeling that she had a successful life, that she was loved. And it's not what we want for our life. It's not our dream to be able to live this world feeling that we had a good life and people that love us. That's beautiful.

00:43:43 And what a gift that and I always feel like you wanting to record was kind of the universe, god, whatever you believe in, getting involved, being like, you got to get this on film. It's such a beautiful, beautiful story. Miriam, I have to thank you so much again for joining your next stop and sharing your story because again, your story is going to help others and you guys definitely go get the book, three gCycle li v e. And I know we're going to be in touch. I know that we will have a long history of just staying connected because I love that you just have this message and you've learned so much in your life that you want to share with others and I think it's really important.

00:44:23 So thank you again for joining your next stop. Thank you for giving me the opportunity. And I believe that together we will be hopefully creating a positive impact today. And please, guys, don't wait to see something that is painful in your life. Don't wait to the targeting far, the accident or losing someone.

00:44:45 It's not necessarily we don't need to get to that extreme to change our mind. We can do it in a healthy way, in a happy way without the drama included. So please avoid that. Learn from others. That's my best advice.

00:44:59 I love that. Well, guys, you know what to do, like share, rate and review and please go follow Miriam on LinkedIn and of course three gCycle li ve for her book and follow along because this is not it. I know Miriam has a lot of other things to do. So again, like share, rate and review and we will see you guys next time for another episode of your next stop. Thank you again, Miriam you I hope you've liked this episode of your Next stop.

00:45:27 Please subscribe to my channel, share with your friends and join in each week our.

 

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