S1E24: Uncovering Hidden Strengths Through Introspection

Delve into the paradox of self-awareness as we journeythrough the empowering and overwhelming effects of introspection, shedding light on the benefits and challenges of understanding dyslexia.

In this episode, you will be able to:

• Uncover the power of introspection for understanding dyslexia impacts.
• Enhance self-awareness to navigate dyslexia-related challenges with ease.
• Foster continuous personal growth and healing through the practice of introspection.
• Gain insight into your own needs and how to meet them effectively.
• Discover the transformative benefits of introspection for individuals with dyslexia.

Navigate dyslexia-related challenges with practical strategies
By mastering introspection and self-awareness, individuals with dyslexia can devise strategies that help navigate daily challenges. Recognizing personal patterns and understanding their authentic selves may illuminate different paths to seeking solutions. This approach not only helps manage dyslexia-related obstacles but also fosters resilience and empowerment in their everyday lives.

Transcript:

00:00:01:06 - 00:00:27:14

Speaker 1

Welcome to Word Blindness Dyslexia Exposed. I am Juliet Hahn. I'm here with my co-host, Brant Sopel, and we are here to change the narrative. We want to educate, but we also want you guys to understand what it is like to be dyslexic and how things can change. So join us every week for word blindness. Dyslexia exposed. Welcome back to Word blindness.

 

00:00:27:14 - 00:00:33:02

Speaker 1

This is Juliet Hahn. I am here with my co-host, Brant Sopel. How are you, darling?

 

00:00:33:04 - 00:00:37:14

Speaker 2

boy. Where do we start? Where do we start?

 

00:00:37:16 - 00:00:54:06

Speaker 1

I know. Well, we wanted to unload on Brad's episode the last couple of days. You've also had some really interesting calls and messages. We got a lot of really good feedback from Brad's episode. A lot of really great feedback.

 

00:00:54:07 - 00:00:58:19

Speaker 2

Well, here you are. Credit to him, right? That wasn't easy.

 

00:00:58:19 - 00:00:59:07

Speaker 1

Because that wasn't.

 

00:00:59:07 - 00:01:21:07

Speaker 2

Easy. And then, you know, obviously, you've been vulnerable on here, too, you know, Shaun Marsh and crying. You know, you've come a long ways, but your mental health and your guys have, we always talk about that. So for him to, you know, come out on a and say those things he said right away, you know it's you know what do they say Women say 30,000 words a day.

 

00:01:21:07 - 00:01:45:04

Speaker 2

We say 10,000 are those 10,000 were wrong and 5000, you know, so courageous for him to say that, to start that and show that vulnerability. And once you show that vulnerability is when you start healing. So, you know, I was obviously kudos to him for you know, for doing it. And you're shedding a few tears along the way.

 

00:01:45:06 - 00:02:02:08

Speaker 1

I got to and then then I listened to it and I cried again. I was like, my God. Because and I think it's I think it's just what you said, that vulnerability. But like, he what did he say? He goes, I, I wanted to cancel like five or six times. I mean, he said that he's like, there was like times where I was like, I don't want to do this.

 

00:02:02:08 - 00:02:18:05

Speaker 1

I don't want to do this. But what he did was and this is what I think is beautiful and this is what you do every frickin day, is it's not about you. And that's what he said. He's like, I had to take it out of his own. Like, this is not about me. This is about who I can help.

 

00:02:18:07 - 00:02:37:16

Speaker 1

And I mean, that's what you you've done the work and thought that, you know, for so many years, right? It's like it's not about you. It's about. It's not. It's your story is to heal other people. And that's one of the reasons why we do this, you know, podcast, because it's these stories that connect with people. I mean, I say it all the time, stories connect us and they really, really do.

 

00:02:37:18 - 00:02:58:19

Speaker 1

And the fact that he was so open, like I'm really uncomfortable, I don't I didn't want to talk about this. I mean, and he got choked up a number of times. And then the message we got afterwards was, you know, I said to him, I said, your episodes out as it and it's okay if you don't want to release and some people don't like to re listen, but it could be a good thing if you re listened to I listen to it.

 

00:02:58:19 - 00:03:22:15

Speaker 1

Just let you know. I cried again pretty much at the same parts and it could be healing. But again, no pressure. And he did. He said he re listened. He's like it was really hard, almost as hard as doing it. He goes, But you've given me the space and you've made me think of things really different. And I'm now approaching things really different just because of that.

 

00:03:22:17 - 00:03:47:12

Speaker 2

You know, when you re listen to yourself, you know, early on, first couple of second times, you're like you hear your voice like, like it nails on a chalkboard. When you got to listen your own voice, like when I you know, doing media something, No, I don't want to listen to my fucking voice, all that horror. So, you know, I don't think he's listening in voice who I was probably kicking the teeth, but the one thing that he said was, I hope this helps.

 

00:03:47:14 - 00:04:13:09

Speaker 2

It's anybody in this community, you know. you know, just pop in your piece. Be It's not. You're okay. No, we're not. And it's not a hope. I guarantee it's going to impact people and change lives. For him doing that. When we talk about, you know, I have a timer on your, you know, obviously and review but share my story.

 

00:04:13:09 - 00:04:39:18

Speaker 2

I'm not foreign born. People always use that word with me. I'm open and honest because I know I'm not the only one know. It's, you know, here 10:00 the morning after ten, I know there's kids sitting in the classroom and I just brings it back. So I'll talk all tell my story truthfully, honestly, every single day, a million times a day, because it's going to land on somebody's heart.

 

00:04:39:20 - 00:05:27:17

Speaker 2

It's going to hit them. Exactly. Brad did. And save lives. You know, we can go down the spectrum of obviously heart and stroke and cancer and epilepsy and yo, I'm learning disorders and autism, ill people have no idea how many suicides happen because of dyslexia or. Yeah, you know, describe fear or ADHD when you can't commit. And you know this weekend you talked about had somebody reach out to me on Instagram and here's actually with a guy I used to play with when I was 16 and 17 and love it.

 

00:05:27:19 - 00:05:51:10

Speaker 2

An absolute legend. He was who he was. His nickname. So I said, you know, here's my number. Text me now. It's Saturday night. Actually, on Sunday, it's actually I call him Yo talk for 45 minutes. You know, he's you went to college in the US for golf. He's back in Canada coaching hockey. He's like, I have this dyslexic kid.

 

00:05:51:10 - 00:06:17:17

Speaker 2

Can you help me? And we you know, we talk for, you know, 45 minutes and he just couldn't believe what I was telling him how to coach a kid and what it means. And how to do drills with them, how to show them he was in almost speeches for 45 minutes because he had no idea and he came from the golf world.

 

00:06:17:17 - 00:06:40:19

Speaker 2

Then we got into golf and he was just, you know, mind blowing. So going back to that's why that's my purpose. That's why I always say reach out, because I don't care who you are. You know, I know what it is to struggle every fucking day. And it ain't easy. But the more we talk about it more open, we're all, you know, no autism or whatever it was.

 

00:06:40:23 - 00:06:47:16

Speaker 2

You know, 20 years is where we are now. So to change the world and easy right now.

 

00:06:47:16 - 00:07:04:13

Speaker 1

And I love that. And I mean, and the thing is, I mean, even I just I shared with you today in yoga, like I could not get this one pose because we added blocks and I couldn't get my brain when to go there. Now, a number of years ago, that probably would have made me feel really shitty.

 

00:07:04:15 - 00:07:22:04

Speaker 1

I would have I would have brushed it off and been like, okay, whatever. But I can kind of giggle about it. And I actually had to say to the teacher, Can you I, I, I don't understand what you're saying. And it literally was just doing the same pose, but putting blocks under my ass and my leg. And I just for some reason, the left and the right and I couldn't do it.

 

00:07:22:04 - 00:07:35:17

Speaker 1

And afterwards I said to her and an acquaintance is in my class, I, one of my friends, and she's like, I know that. She's like, I could see your giggling. She goes, And I know that you're comfortable with it. Now She goes, So it was it was funny to watch. And I was like, I know it was funny.

 

00:07:35:17 - 00:07:56:11

Speaker 1

I was like, I literally she's saying left and right and I your left leg, your right, and I could not do it. And I literally became paralyzed. And again, in a different time of my life, I would have been really frustrated and probably defeated for a second and gotten out of my head and been like, but because we talk about it and we've made it okay.

 

00:07:56:11 - 00:08:16:21

Speaker 1

And again, we've talked about, you know, the years that I've done work and I've made it okay, number of years, but there's always certain situations where it still come back, you know, come back, comes, comes back and gets us can say that just like you were right before you mentioned test and I got this like I literally I felt like someone punched me in the chest and I was like, my God.

 

00:08:17:01 - 00:08:47:02

Speaker 1

he said test. And I got like massive anxiety because I was like, shit. There's two things I still need to do for Montgomery. And, and I, like, started my breath serves me up. I was like, okay, I got to take a breath. Those kind of things take us down. And if you people out there, that happens all the time and if you're a kid and you don't know how to, you know, kids go through so many different things and those little little things that just kind of add up, it makes your day shitty and it's and it's not it's not good.

 

00:08:47:02 - 00:08:50:20

Speaker 1

So yes, the conversations and God.

 

00:08:50:22 - 00:08:51:12

Speaker 2

No, it's.

 

00:08:51:12 - 00:08:52:08

Speaker 1

You know, because.

 

00:08:52:10 - 00:09:18:11

Speaker 2

As much as frustrated as you know, it's just you teacher teachers, an example, you know you're frustrated that you know the kid you know can't do what you know whatever try being our brains when we can't, you know, we beat ourselves up ten times more. You know, I get, you know, parents saying, you know, my kids, your practice, they're boring or, you know, this is stupid.

 

00:09:18:12 - 00:09:36:23

Speaker 2

You know, my brain can't handle it. You go there, take a left, you're down here, take a left and spin around and do a local loop. Come back. Then you do this. And 65 things just I lost you. I don't know. I can hear. I don't know what one word you just said. Yeah. And when I talked to the guy yesterday, I can only do two steps.

 

00:09:36:23 - 00:09:52:23

Speaker 2

One to go. Here, pick up this. Anything. After that, I'm gone. So try being a kid, going. Okay, I do remember. I can remember. I can't remember. I do this, I do this. It it is okay now I can't and I'm getting out that fuck.

 

00:09:53:01 - 00:10:15:02

Speaker 1

But one of the things that you also said, that which is so important and this is where it is lost. So yes, the steps like multi dimensional steps, multistep steps, whatever. But when you coach, it is about the basics. That's when you get as good as you can, because those basics, when you strengthen those basics, the small list things, that's when your game grows.

 

00:10:15:02 - 00:10:33:16

Speaker 1

And so many coaches and I mean and I shouldn't say that so many I just know there's so many people out there like when So a kid's like, that's boring. No, but you're strengthening so many things that that's just going to take their game to the next level and that's lost because everything I mean, and we've talked about this so many times, everything is about, you know, their parents are scrutinizing.

 

00:10:33:16 - 00:10:54:08

Speaker 1

I mean, it's hard to it's really hard to be in any kind of teaching, coaching all of these things because of parents. Now, helicopter, whatever, last, you know, ten, 20 years, whatever it is. And so if you think about it, when you strengthen those little things, I mean, that's like the 10,000 hour. I mean, that goes all the way back to fundamentals.

 

00:10:54:10 - 00:11:07:10

Speaker 1

If you can't skate right correctly, if you do not have a solid skate, your game is not going to get to that next level because you're not going to be able to go as fast as you can. You're not going to be able to do the turns. Now, I obviously don't use skating, so.

 

00:11:07:10 - 00:11:07:23

Speaker 2

You.

 

00:11:08:00 - 00:11:10:16

Speaker 1

Have to take it. Yeah, Yeah.

 

00:11:10:18 - 00:11:13:06

Speaker 2

Details. I always see it. You know, it's details.

 

00:11:13:06 - 00:11:14:13

Speaker 1

Yeah.

 

00:11:14:15 - 00:11:22:04

Speaker 2

That, you know, obviously you're talking about a lot of trauma in basketball and soccer. It's the details. If you don't have the details.

 

00:11:22:04 - 00:11:23:19

Speaker 1

Kids better.

 

00:11:23:21 - 00:11:47:21

Speaker 2

100%, you know, And you know where I'm, you know, coaching, you know often, you know all the parents I get told all the time you got no idea how you're coaching. Most coaches are not ranked in the Timberwolves. They're they're terrible. They want to flip the puck up to but they're like, how are you winning and how, you know, you're rigging this, you're doing this.

 

00:11:47:21 - 00:12:08:17

Speaker 2

No, because I'm teaching details. The details is how you get, you know, hockey, for an example. It's not it's not a game. If it's not feet, it's inches inches that most people can't see, you know? No, I'm terrible, mom. You know, it tells me, you know, she's never been on the ice and she's thrown her pounds worse the park district and tells me how to coach.

 

00:12:08:19 - 00:12:28:16

Speaker 2

You don't even see the details, right? It's no, the details are in your life. You know, you're an adult. You know, a job. You know, you can't get to four. You got to get to one. Or you didn't go for an example. And your buddies, kid, he say college, do math in his head. You got to show your work.

 

00:12:28:18 - 00:12:34:05

Speaker 2

Do you want you know, we have to that's a detail.

 

00:12:34:07 - 00:12:57:10

Speaker 1

But it's so crazy because that's I mean, it's it is so and then we can go off of sports, but I mean, also bringing it back to Brad, like when you do those rap. So like Terminus and basketball, are there going to be times where it's boring if you just dribble? Terrible, terrible dribble. But if you're doing your if you get strong in your left and right and you dribble and you're the best dribbler, your fucking game is going to be better than the kid that's just running around on the court now.

 

00:12:57:13 - 00:13:18:06

Speaker 1

And this is where I think for parents it's like they get tricky is because like when you're young and you're playing and you run and okay, you can score. And if a kid's athletic, those little details are not. But then when it gets to that next level and that's what's important, you have to get those fundamentals when they're little because when you get to that next level, if they don't have those fundamentals, they're never going to get to that next thing and it doesn't support it.

 

00:13:18:07 - 00:13:20:06

Speaker 1

But if they are, yeah.

 

00:13:20:08 - 00:13:23:09

Speaker 2

That sports aren't sports anymore.

 

00:13:23:11 - 00:13:24:10

Speaker 1

00:13:24:12 - 00:13:52:19

Speaker 2

You lot, you play lacrosse and field hockey and you loved it for the game. Yeah. Yeah. I loved hockey for the game. You know, now it's a business, you know, for hockey, you know, $300 a stick yelling more supporters have zero clue. I can go on you know you want to Instagram stuff most of the stuff they only do the fancy guys that there's not 95% is our life well.

 

00:13:52:21 - 00:13:53:21

Speaker 1

Right.

 

00:13:53:23 - 00:14:20:05

Speaker 2

It's stealing money You know I watch this stuff and again it's just sad that the game of hockey my parents and it was for me and my friends and my teammates. Your game? You know, it wasn't the way it is now. It wasn't the money. And, you know, it was it was a sport. Now, when you start getting paid, everybody's like, you know, talk about hockey.

 

00:14:20:05 - 00:14:49:02

Speaker 2

Do you still play now? No, because it was a business. You don't see too many people who retire, you know, when they're 65. Go back and hang out at the office. All this. I know it's a business for me, right? It's right. They've taken the fun away from the game, you know, no matter what sport you're talking about, you know, football or basketball or soccer or whatever, they've taken the fun away, as most coaches are about wins and about their paycheck and their lies that they have no idea what they're talking about.

 

00:14:49:04 - 00:14:52:15

Speaker 2

And it's and goes back to it's not for the kids.

 

00:14:52:17 - 00:15:10:14

Speaker 1

Yeah well and that's and that's so many different I mean that's so much different things. And I'm going to take you back to the interview with Brad, because that's he was saying where he got his confidence. And this is what we talk about all the time. And that's what's the shame of it, is because when you get your confidence from something that has now changed, it's really tough.

 

00:15:10:14 - 00:15:33:10

Speaker 1

But the reason why I, I think I got also so emotional in that episode is like you two are, you know, I mean, I'm MMA fighter hockey player like they're tough, rugged men and it's hard to be on the side of like, I'm going to you need to express it. But again, that's where the healing starts and that's what, you know, the society is.

 

00:15:33:10 - 00:15:53:08

Speaker 1

I go, don't show your emotions. Don't I mean, we've gotten a lot better, you know, I mean, a lot better. But it is so important because we talk about stuffing, right? When you can talk openly, when you can express that, when you talk about, yes, I'm not the best housewife, I put things, but the dirty dishes in the oven, there's things that it's fine, right.

 

00:15:53:08 - 00:16:10:10

Speaker 1

But someone else might be like, my God, I would never admit that. I would never admit that because that shows like then I'm not perfect. I'm not perfect. And I like I actually would never want to be perfect. Nothing perfect is boring, but this is what people hide behind things. And just just say it right. I'm having a hard day.

 

00:16:10:12 - 00:16:15:03

Speaker 1

Like, I can't I don't know. My left and right. Yes, I'm 50 and I don't know my last race.

 

00:16:15:05 - 00:16:38:06

Speaker 2

And that's what the way the world is. As fucked up as it is. You know, each one of us are our own people. You know, it's hard, okay? There's no right or wrong. It doesn't work for you, you know? And yesterday, when I when I was talking to the you know, talking to a guy about dyslexia, I was talking about hockey.

 

00:16:38:08 - 00:16:59:11

Speaker 2

I never took a pre-game nap. You know, every hockey player does. And I might be the only one in the world. And I was telling physical, wow, you know, it works for me. Now, can you look at somebody and say, that's fucked up. You're you're right. It might be to you, but do you know what? It works for them.

 

00:16:59:11 - 00:17:22:20

Speaker 2

And then, you know, we started we're talking about schedule, right? Yeah. Where to be in, how to be and how we need that schedule. Schedule to live. We can get off it in a second, but it's so hard to get back on it. And you, It's okay. Each one of us are our own people. And I said this to who?

 

00:17:22:20 - 00:17:49:23

Speaker 2

I don't remember them. A my friend Danny, you fall in love with yourself and truly love yourself. You will never get better than them because then and so true. Like she said, I mean, you love yourself and that goes back to you can see it the way it is. And yeah, I do. A lot of people get pissed off.

 

00:17:50:01 - 00:17:56:10

Speaker 2

Yeah. No, I'll tell you where it is. I don't care. But you love yourself.

 

00:17:56:12 - 00:17:57:21

Speaker 1

But it's also it is refreshing.

 

00:17:57:21 - 00:17:58:15

Speaker 2

Your life and I.

 

00:17:58:15 - 00:18:17:19

Speaker 1

Think more people need to. And again, it's not like we're not telling people we're not. It's it's were true to who we are again, because we've done a lot of healing and that's just our personality. And there's like a lot to go behind it. But to be able just to say, yeah, I'm not perfect, like the schedule thing, I think this is what was really cool.

 

00:18:17:19 - 00:18:36:09

Speaker 1

Also with that Brad story, I mean his podcast is you were talking about your routines. I was talking about my oldest routines, like since he got hurt and like, you know, and I had like this moments because I was like, you know what? I probably should have a little more. I'm sometimes I'm 5 minutes late for everything.

 

00:18:36:09 - 00:19:00:04

Speaker 1

Like, that's my routine. It is. But I was thinking about when I was when my kids were early and I was in early motherhood and I am like a pretty light, fun loving person. And I was so strict, like friends and family were like, What the fuck is happening? And I was like, What do you mean? They're like, You're so like, why do you have to be so regimented?

 

00:19:00:04 - 00:19:17:16

Speaker 1

And I was like, I didn't know. And it actually was there were times where I would be like, why can't I be more relaxed about this? Like, I was like, very regimented. And now after talking to that, even Brad was like, Thank you for saying that, because in our house this is, you know, it's we kind of him and his wife maybe have disagreements.

 

00:19:17:16 - 00:19:38:09

Speaker 1

He's like, I need it like this. They said when they're at a young age, it is it's so interesting because I would have friends would be like, God, you're this is so weird. Like, this is weird because you are so this way, but then you don't give a shit about this and that they don't even match and it doesn't make any sense, but it's how I was able to really, I guess, be the best mom I could be.

 

00:19:38:11 - 00:19:55:22

Speaker 2

And that's how smart we are. Although you want to talk about like, you know, I want to get outside. I means chaos. I want it down. That's how smart we are, you know, that's how smart we are when it comes to figuring out, like, my routines. It was the most fucked up, bizarre people. Laughable. I think I just walked up, you know?

 

00:19:55:23 - 00:20:24:12

Speaker 2

And if I didn't do that exactly, I was horrendous. So I always talk What? That was the glue that was holding my life together. I had no idea. You know, I didn't nap the more tired I was going into the game, the less my dyslexia and my A.D.D. ADHD works. So basically I could play and not think. But that's how smart we are to figure out what we need to make to get by.

 

00:20:24:14 - 00:20:45:09

Speaker 2

You know, till this day there's still pause and people laugh. How crazy it is and how all over the place. But that's I had no idea. I figured that out for myself. What I needed to do. Yes. Is that it was crazy. Absolutely. Just like you figured out what you needed to do without even knowing what you were doing.

 

00:20:45:11 - 00:21:04:14

Speaker 1

Yeah, I mean, and that's what kept you in. I mean, and I found that really fascinating because I was like, that's so interesting. You needed your brain to be tired, but physically, you knew that you could do anything physically because that's you were like, I could play as hard as I can. Where Because you didn't have your, like, so fascinating like that again.

 

00:21:04:14 - 00:21:25:08

Speaker 1

And I'm going to say it, but IQ like dyslexia has nothing to do with your IQ. Usually your IQ is higher. That fireman I met on the ski lift, he's like, He's a guy we're really, really high, like freakishly high IQ. And I said, This is surprise me. And then he went off, like at this giant jump and like, flew into the air and I was like, my God, he totally 80 day because he is a fireman.

 

00:21:25:09 - 00:21:49:13

Speaker 1

He's like, Yeah, text me later. I mean, we're going to have hopefully have him on the podcast because that was that was fascinating. But that's what it is. It is we adapt the way we need it and we're very introspective without sometimes realizing that we're introspective. Like that was one of the my mom would always say, yes, you know, like I knew everything about how I worked my like, I can tell if I, I mean, even still sometimes it's annoying.

 

00:21:49:13 - 00:22:07:09

Speaker 1

Sometimes it can be a little exhausting. Like if I eat too much sugar or if I eat certain foods, I know that doesn't work well with me and and it is. But it was also really great because then when you're going through different stages in your life and you're like, okay, I am introspective. I do know how I work because we've done the work, right?

 

00:22:07:09 - 00:22:19:09

Speaker 1

You don't realize you're doing the work, but then when you start healing and doing the work, I mean, I've said that to you so many times, I thought I healed. And then since we've done the podcast, I've had so many. Like, I'm like, no, I'm healing even more. Like, this is crazy.

 

00:22:19:11 - 00:22:47:05

Speaker 2

You don't stop healing. You know, that's, you know, every one of us should be going to a therapist, counselor or whatever, because life is life is hard, right? And then you have kids. You know, we're booking women for Venus now for Mars, like we're two different people. So it's life is not easy. So, you know, there's no such thing as perfect practice.

 

00:22:47:05 - 00:23:09:07

Speaker 2

It doesn't make perfect practice. Make it better if you're trying to be perfect, if you're trying to be a perfectionist, you've got some childhood major childhood trauma and every one of us needs to talk about it. Because if you don't talk about it, if you don't think you need to, you're more fucked up. And everybody, right? Because the world's not easy.

 

00:23:09:09 - 00:23:41:17

Speaker 2

Marriage is an easy. Life isn't easy. School isn't easy. There's nothing that nobody breezes through. So, yeah, we all got kids now. They want the instant gratification of I did this, I'm here. No, you never stop healing. Yo. If you stop healing, you're. You're toast. You don't stop growing. You're missing so much what's out there, You know, to be able to look at it a little bit differently, to be okay, you know, we talk about feelings.

 

00:23:41:18 - 00:24:05:13

Speaker 2

If to talk about it, to have a, you know, a good relationship with your your partner, you got to be okay to have conversations. And you're two different people. And you have to understand, you know, again, it's going to be hard conversations, but that's life is not easy like anybody. It's not Desperate Housewives, white picket fences. Yeah. If you take some Xanax, couple Xanax bars and some white wine.

 

00:24:05:18 - 00:24:32:04

Speaker 2

Absolutely it is. Right? Right now. That's why I that's why most people I always say sober people are most of the most time the best people because we got to self-reflect every day to stay sober. You know, and try having sober sex all the time. It's, you know, crazy.

 

00:24:32:06 - 00:25:03:20

Speaker 1

But but it is. I mean, so many so many points. And I know, you know, again, we've talked about this a number of different ways on the podcast, but having like Brad on interviewing Dan, right. Who's going to be coming up in a couple of months, and even him saying, you know, the thing that I thought was really interesting, what he said is, you know, as much as he was getting by and I mean he's fascinating to you guys hear that he's basically doing stock trading in high school, you know, but not doing great in school.

 

00:25:04:00 - 00:25:22:17

Speaker 1

But then when he went through the Depression, I mean, that, again, is not an easy thing to talk about. You know, we didn't dive too much into it, but the way that his dad kind of approached him and then what he realized he needed it is these conversations. And you need to find someone to have it. You need to listen.

 

00:25:22:17 - 00:25:40:17

Speaker 1

And we've talked about this a couple of times and we can touch on this again. But like someone might be saying, okay, I can't afford a therapist or I don't know what to do, and I'm listening to this. And I you know, whether you're dyslexic or not or you're struggling, you can kind of write things down. I mean, Brian, you talks about that for voice tax things like, right.

 

00:25:40:17 - 00:26:01:04

Speaker 1

I talk about using the voice app to really kind of break things down and just get things off your chest because the stuffing is really what you know now. You think of the stove every time that stuff is really gets in your face. But the stuffing is really what fucks people, right? You can't stop things. It's going to come out somewhere.

 

00:26:01:08 - 00:26:18:12

Speaker 1

I mean, and that's it's going to come out somewhere and that's like and we've all done it. We've all done it. We've all been like, I don't really like this feeling. I'm just going to put it back in my head. I'm not going to talk about I don't know how to approach, I don't know. But if you can write it down or talk into your phone because you don't want to talk to someone else.

 

00:26:18:14 - 00:26:37:04

Speaker 2

Yeah, there's many different ways to getting out, you know? Is that talking to a friend? Is that talking to a therapist? So when I say that, you know, you're talking something right now liable for. Yeah, it doesn't have to be. You know, there's different outlets. I know people that paints. Yo, you talk about writing, yo, you can grab a piece of paper and just write.

 

00:26:37:04 - 00:26:54:07

Speaker 2

There doesn't have to be a story about spelling. It doesn't have the sentences. That doesn't have to be period. Now just write, Yo, that's a way of not putting it in the closet, you know? You know, as I as I talk about it, it's there's many different ways and there's no right or wrong to that. Is that working out?

 

00:26:54:07 - 00:27:25:20

Speaker 2

Is that boring yoga? Is that going on a walk on moms in the morning? Run them out when there's no right or wrong. It's doing different things and finding out what works for you. You know, if you always talk about, you know, school and bullying and, you know, things like that, you know, there's always a reason why, you know, And that's what we don't do as a society is okay.

 

00:27:25:22 - 00:27:30:05

Speaker 2

We don't do anything about bullying or you can't do it. Okay.

 

00:27:30:07 - 00:27:34:00

Speaker 1

I know what's sad. Tesla kids and Grace.

 

00:27:34:02 - 00:27:38:00

Speaker 2

Is, you know, it is, you know.

 

00:27:38:02 - 00:27:38:22

Speaker 1

So backwards.

 

00:27:38:22 - 00:28:05:01

Speaker 2

Everything's so stupid, just like, you know, the suicide hotline number. That's not Fuck off, You're going to die. I've been there. Yeah, well, it's bullshit. That's not how it works, right? Bullying. Okay, You can't say that. Okay, well, you're right. You can't say that. But what was said? Why do we get there? Is what we don't touch on.

 

00:28:05:03 - 00:28:30:04

Speaker 2

We've got people in suits that are hiding behind that. They're making this that lie and they've got no fucking idea. So it's what was said. why did we get here? What happened up to it, you know, and educate on that, you know, that's why and you'll learn in sort of this lecture, you know, so much embarrassment, somebody is in a wheelchair or, you know, someone's blind.

 

00:28:30:06 - 00:28:50:23

Speaker 2

Close your eyes. You can't you can, you know, kind of understand what they're going through. But for us, you can't you and people want change, but you're not going to teach them what it is to be us. And you've got Dragon as long as you stuff in it. And I'll come on at some point in time.

 

00:28:50:23 - 00:29:08:02

Speaker 2

Trust me. You know, it represents the little dragon head. And every time she has gets bigger, better, and harder and deeper each and every time. And trust me, you know, like I said, I was almost dead before 40, you know, with all the drugs and alcohol, and I was trying to kill myself before then, and I didn't succeed.

 

00:29:08:04 - 00:29:08:11

Speaker 2

Thank you.

 

00:29:08:15 - 00:29:10:17

Speaker 1

It's Sarah.

 

00:29:10:17 - 00:29:15:04

Speaker 2

So your life and easy life in easy.

 

00:29:15:06 - 00:29:42:06

Speaker 1

Yeah. So I want to also take it to another question that I've recently had. Someone asked me. They said that their spouse is the one that doesn't agree, like doesn't see that their child has dyslexia or doesn't. And they're not they don't know where the dyslexia has come from. So I'll leave it at that as well. I have a feeling that's probably also that doesn't work, does want to acknowledge it, but that's that's another question.

 

00:29:42:08 - 00:29:59:16

Speaker 1

So I haven't had a chance to we're going to actually talk this week because she's like, can you give me some tips? But I thought this actually could be a really great conversation that you and I can have on here to help, because there are so many people out there that have that right. Their kids diagnosed maybe. And then this is not a and this is not a spouse.

 

00:29:59:16 - 00:30:20:19

Speaker 1

It's the child's father. So it's not you know, they're not married anymore. So they don't have this, like, great communication, I'm figuring. So what are some things that a parents that is trying to she's like, I'm fighting the school and now I'm fighting the father. She's like, I feel like I'm fighting everyone and it's just to help this kid.

 

00:30:20:21 - 00:30:34:22

Speaker 1

So I mean, and I said to her, I go, I have to think about it, because I don't I can kind of walk you through, but I don't know this person. Right? So you really it depends on how you want to approach it. Everyone needs to be approached a certain way.

 

00:30:35:00 - 00:30:36:23

Speaker 2

Yeah. You know, it's first off.

 

00:30:37:01 - 00:30:39:18

Speaker 1

He's not he's a Canadian divorce and maybe, maybe, you know.

 

00:30:39:18 - 00:31:10:10

Speaker 2

And settle down now. Settle down, obviously, when you're divorced that, you know, the co-parenting, your situation isn't easy. You know I haven't with my ex Count zero, you know nothing there. So it's, you know first off your fighting your your acts of whatever, you know, and the school, it's control what you can control. Right. And that's when you're with your kid.

 

00:31:10:12 - 00:31:41:12

Speaker 2

It's up to trying to understand them to the greatest detail now and so she thinks you know came from from his side so one she doesn't have it so she just she doesn't have the full understanding and the connection with, you know, with their child. And connection me means it means something different. You know, it's the kid knows that you love them, you know, but they know just that little extra that you don't you don't have it.

 

00:31:41:12 - 00:32:23:08

Speaker 2

So you don't understand. So it's the simple things when you're at home, you know, figuring out what you know, just use homework for an example. Soon as they get to that point, you know, close that book, don't force it. You know, have that fight with the teachers through you, not through the kid, you know, And, you know, and I never you know, I talked to a buddy of mine who's now divorced, having problems, payments, you know, mom owes him money, you know, and his daughter's high school.

 

00:32:23:11 - 00:32:43:04

Speaker 2

Hey, did you ask mom for the money? She doesn't know because she doesn't want to get in the middle, Right? So it's you can't use a kid in the middle. You know, I said to him, I said, you may not get that money back, but it's mental health. And your kid, she doesn't want you know, that's mom, that's I don't want to be part of it.

 

00:32:43:04 - 00:33:11:08

Speaker 2

I don't you know, it's you know, so it's learning what your kid is and doing what you can when you're with them. You know, it's the homework. Yeah. And self esteem finding what they like and going do not find the old did you or your Disneyland dad right. No make that Disneyland on time with your kid and it's not buying it it's not buying them.

 

00:33:11:10 - 00:33:32:17

Speaker 2

It's No. What makes them happy where they get that self-esteem from. Is it going out and building a snowman, Is it going out and going for a walk? Or, you know, when Montgomery was little, walk around the city pointing at signs, Are you going with an RV to a bookstore? So what is that with that with your kid?

 

00:33:32:18 - 00:34:01:02

Speaker 2

So that's, you know, throw that and that will become a very, very special, safe place for them in so many ways that you'll you'll never understand by just those little things. You're at home not getting frustrated with them. Yes. You might be fucking frustrated telling Mark my word, you're going to be champ battling through it to help finish this or I ask of you with all this.

 

00:34:01:02 - 00:34:18:03

Speaker 2

If you can bring that back down and kind of walk with them, those little things become their safe space in ways you'll never understand because you're not on the side of the road.

 

00:34:18:05 - 00:34:34:03

Speaker 1

And I think the thing with the homework I think is a really good and all the tips that you just gave is really important. But again, right, the one parent is not dyslexic, so helping the kid through it by, you know, understanding, okay, this is like even.

 

00:34:34:03 - 00:34:48:06

Speaker 2

If you're married and still together, even if you're married still together, you know, wife or husband, they don't have it. They don't understand. So it's going to be a fight, divorced or together no matter what. So it's you know, it's doing we're saying.

 

00:34:48:07 - 00:35:02:11

Speaker 1

Yeah. And being aware like watching your kid and seeing the cues and this is why this is so hard. And I was not good at this. I mean, we talk about, you know, Montgomery having him do his homework and I'm cooking and the dogs are running around, the kids are screaming. He's like, I can't focus. And I was like, What do you mean?

 

00:35:02:11 - 00:35:22:18

Speaker 1

Why can't you focus now? That's an ADHD mom being like, What are you talking about? Just go ahead, do it. This is obviously when we were getting we did realize that he was struggling as much as he was, but not doing things where there's a lot of distraction around so you can really read your child and feel their cues, like if they all of a sudden tighten up or like you can see them inching their head or doing something.

 

00:35:22:22 - 00:35:44:11

Speaker 1

I just read somewhere that this little kindergartner, he started chewing on his sleeve and the mom was like, he's never seen him sleep, I think. And he's she thinks he's dyslexic, hasn't gotten tested yet. And I was like, yeah, that just brought me to like, because I know, like I had a nephew that did the same thing right When school started getting, they started chewing on their like shirt and everyone's like, Why is he trying?

 

00:35:44:11 - 00:35:45:10

Speaker 1

I'm sure he has all these holes.

 

00:35:45:10 - 00:36:11:12

Speaker 2

In their nails or got hang nails or start chewing, you know, all those little signs or I don't want to go to school, I got a bellyache or my stomach hurts. You know, these are all major, major signs of anxiety. So it's right. You know, I feel bad, you know? What's that? I'm a jack of all trades, a master of none.

 

00:36:11:13 - 00:36:37:10

Speaker 2

You know, your moms and you. Yeah, I'm obviously not one. I'm going to come back. My next life is my ex-wife. But then. But it's. Yes, you do. You have a lot on your plate. Yes. With the kids, 100%. But staying presence is the hardest and most important thing world. It's hard. And, you know, you have to fill those feelings.

 

00:36:37:10 - 00:37:04:23

Speaker 2

And you know, this kid, I got to make dinner and, you know, I didn't do this. you have 50 things to do today. That's not realistic. You're not being nice to yourself. So in a relationship, man or woman, if you're not nice to yourself, how you expecting? You're supposed to be nice to you. If you know human that can't do 50.

 

00:37:05:01 - 00:37:15:00

Speaker 2

I had ten things I need on my list. Okay? I didn't get through, all right? I got through this.

 

00:37:15:02 - 00:37:34:19

Speaker 1

Yeah, it is. It it's. And it's those little things just to kind of into things. So that's what I was kind of saying to her. But I love that you said you got to. You got to know what to fight and what not to. You can't control the other person. You have to kind of control yourself. And we've also had, you know conversations with and Brad even talks about it.

 

00:37:35:00 - 00:37:52:15

Speaker 1

You know, he was panicked that his kid was going to be dyslexic. So he really started drilling him with like reading or be like, no, you have to do it. You have to do it. And I've had recently I've had conversations with a couple of people, you know, this family, and the dad didn't realize he was dyslexic. And so I think we kind of talked and that an interesting revelation.

 

00:37:52:17 - 00:38:14:06

Speaker 1

But he also was like, shit. He's like, okay, I don't want him to go through what I went through in school. So I really have been drilling, had a mind. I'm like, I know, but he's not. It's not the you didn't get lack of resources like, right, Like knowing that he's dyslexic so that is tough. So now you're making him feel like he's not going to able to do it like you just pause, breathe.

 

00:38:14:08 - 00:38:34:04

Speaker 1

There's a development and you really appreciate it. Really appreciate me that much in the beginning. And I was like, this is interesting, But pause and breathe because that's what's like, you're not going to be able to make your dyslexic kid, not dyslexic, right? So if you are the dyslexic parent and you're panicked, my God, I don't want them to go through just they're going to go through stuff.

 

00:38:34:04 - 00:38:52:16

Speaker 1

But you can make it last. Like Montgomery's gone through last stuff. Lyla's gone through last stuff, right? Then we went through. But they're still going to go through stuff. I mean, but if you can be there as their support and their love and their advocate and really help them through it as much as you can by being present as you said, is is really important.

 

00:38:52:18 - 00:39:19:22

Speaker 2

And I don't think any parent, you know, I want my kid to struggle. Yeah, I going to get good now, you know so I'm going to defend all the, you know, non dyslexic in this conversation is we got to put ourselves in their shoes as a yo yo. Just, you know. Yeah. As you know, if I was just, you know, because they don't understand and they don't they're seeing their kids struggle and they don't want to they, they, they want them to not struggle so bad right now they're going over the top.

 

00:39:19:22 - 00:39:43:02

Speaker 2

Right. But well, let's see where it came from. So that's, that's coming from from a great place, too. So I think you have to have some of the understanding of the other side, too. All right. It's okay. I understand. You know, again, it's not easy to to find that route or to stop, you know, normalize it, you know, And like, my daughter got in a car accident.

 

00:39:43:04 - 00:39:58:02

Speaker 2

I should have went if I would have known. Yeah, No shit. Rocket science. If I would have known of the accident, I wouldn't have gone that way. I know. If I was going to do this. Yeah, that's. That's a crystal ball that we don't hang it. You know, hindsight's 2020. You can't take that. Can't change the future on it.

 

00:39:58:02 - 00:39:59:15

Speaker 2

Now.

 

00:39:59:17 - 00:40:17:12

Speaker 1

Yeah. Now. It's so true. And I kind of want to leave this with a couple different because we always we haven't done statistics in a while and so if someone's just starting to listen to this, you know, just like six one in five, it is hereditary.

 

00:40:17:14 - 00:40:18:05

Speaker 2

So if it.

 

00:40:18:05 - 00:40:47:03

Speaker 1

Is a 100%, I just actually had a conversation with some of the other like like I think I'm a dyslexic and I was like, okay, you have kids. Does anyone struggle? And they're like, actually that you said that. I was like, you know, is it is dyslexia is hereditary. And if you're 50%, 50% of your kids, you know, could have some, some sort of learning difference, you know, and any need to run it's deep and especially if it if you know the lineage I mean that's my favorite thing, right?

 

00:40:47:03 - 00:40:51:00

Speaker 1

I'm like, wait, who in your family has that? I love to play that game. Not everyone loves to play my game.

 

00:40:51:05 - 00:41:00:20

Speaker 2

Where did it come from? You know? Where did that come from? The mystery writer over there. Where did this come from and where was this crime? You know, same thing.

 

00:41:00:22 - 00:41:16:16

Speaker 1

I mean, I love I love that. So that's one of the things the other thing that I think just recently we've talked about and is so important that 50 and again, I think this is 56% of people in prison.

 

00:41:16:18 - 00:41:47:22

Speaker 2

Yeah, yeah. 50% of people in prison in the world are dyslexic. And then there's just not that simple. Yo I that's millions and millions and millions of people are in prison because they can't read. But then you have 50% of people in Nassar are dyslexic. I think it's 40% of self-made millionaires are dyslexic. So it's this or this.

 

00:41:48:04 - 00:41:56:09

Speaker 2

There's no in between with us. Kind of like you like me or don't. There's no there's no in between. You like me or not, you know, there's it's I mean, you know.

 

00:41:56:11 - 00:41:58:21

Speaker 1

It's like they're just dirty, wrong.

 

00:41:59:01 - 00:42:15:11

Speaker 2

I'm going to tell you I don't like you, you know? So I'm the same way. But it's, you know, just like, you know, suicides have tripled in teenagers in the last ten years. 90% of the suicide notes left have dyslexic tendencies.

 

00:42:15:13 - 00:42:40:00

Speaker 1

Yeah. I mean, and, like, I want you guys to really think about those statistics. And one of the ones that I mean, one of the reasons why you've been doing what you've been doing for as long as you were, that's charity, The Principle Foundation, six years is because if you have money and you're able to get resources, you know, some people have money, they don't realize their child's dyslexic, but then they are able to go get that neuroscience.

 

00:42:40:00 - 00:42:57:17

Speaker 1

They have the resources. They can, you know, send them to a private school and and get some remediation. And, you know, that that kid's trajectory of life is going to go a little different if you don't have money. And you also don't know how to advocate. I mean, this is the thing that kills me. It makes me so sick to my stomach.

 

00:42:57:17 - 00:43:20:02

Speaker 1

And we talk about this often. We talk about with all the people like the panel that we talk once, twice a month with that, you know, we would sit around and brainstorm about different things is if you don't have the money and you don't have a strong family unit and you're a kid that's just being brushed under the rug, like those are the kids that are going to really suffer.

 

00:43:20:02 - 00:43:42:05

Speaker 1

And and there's two things here. They're going to suffer and they could go down the prison route. They also because, again, dyslexia or very smart were the creative thinkers were like the ones that come up, the visionaries, all these really cool things. We're also missing out on someone that can actually change the world in a different way. And that's, you know, it's so many different.

 

00:43:42:07 - 00:44:13:05

Speaker 1

You could look at it both ways, right? That kid's going to go down a bad path, but it's also the path that, like his good path could have been where he's changing everything. He could have been a Nassau. I mean, so many things. It's this place has to change. We have to change the face of dyslexia because and through education and talking and the understanding, because there's so many people that are kind of going through life or in prison because they were not identified and make sure they're dumb and they don't want to say,

 

00:44:13:06 - 00:44:34:02

Speaker 2

There's so many things that so many ways I can go with this. You know, obviously if you're rich, this actually can be a gift. If you're poor, it's a curse in my I said can be is you know, I just had dinner with somebody a couple of weeks ago. You know, their brothers came along and said, I got to take this call.

 

00:44:34:04 - 00:44:57:08

Speaker 2

It was his son calling from prison. He's in prison. He was selling drugs. And I was so he came back. I'm like, I didn't know I didn't know this as he's taking his call, my body's telling me about it. Came back. We're talking, started talking about it, you know, And he says, Yeah, he was diagnosed with all the learning differences.

 

00:44:57:10 - 00:45:21:15

Speaker 2

And I called and I started telling my mom, That's dyslexic. Know they can't use the word dyslexia in certain states. He had all the money. You know, he's a doctor, but he didn't connect. He was never understood in his house, you know, goes back to early on. You didn't have no you know you all that for get to work harder.

 

00:45:21:20 - 00:45:49:11

Speaker 2

All right. Start yelling every time. You're not working hard, you're lazy, you know, stop being stupid, you know? And he's 30 or 31 years old, six years in prison. So it's not on. Yo, even if you do have money. And that's why it can be a gift, because all you want to do is be loved. I don't care who you are and care where you're from.

 

00:45:49:13 - 00:46:10:18

Speaker 2

You know, you're white, grumbling, pink, blue. You know, we just want to be loved. And a kid wanted to be loved. And he felt like he was letting his dad down, you know? And I can't say his mom because she wasn't there. It wasn't there. They just wanted to be loved. And that's why we turned to drugs and alcohol.

 

00:46:10:18 - 00:46:38:11

Speaker 2

70% of us are addicted to drugs. Alcohol is to escape that pain. That's why I said I love my drugs and alcohol. I was amazing. Never. I didn't have to feel these feelings, you know? So it's that understanding. It's that connection, it's that relatability. So it's easier for us to go down that bad path, to get tied up in the wrong people, because we're already halfway there with the dyslexia.

 

00:46:38:13 - 00:46:47:19

Speaker 1

And I'm going to leave it at that. Look at you closing it out. That was good. Even though we could talk, I guess we could go on and on all.

 

00:46:47:21 - 00:46:50:09

Speaker 2

And we go to some deep rabbit holes.

 

00:46:50:11 - 00:47:13:14

Speaker 1

Yeah, we do. We love our rabbit holes. We guys, thank you again for listening to word blindness. And as Brant said earlier, great review, but share. Share is the most important because you don't know who needs to hear this. You don't know who's like, Wait, I didn't realize that, you know, the statistics that we just did at the end, there's someone that, you know in your family neighbor, that their son or daughter just got diagnosed and the parents don't have understanding.

 

00:47:13:14 - 00:47:29:11

Speaker 1

They don't know what to do in the IEP. They don't know how to approach the teachers. They don't know how to talk about it. These are all of the things that we have talks about. I think this is going to be episode 24, if I'm not mistaken. Three I mean. Right. And we've now connected. We've been doing this since April.

 

00:47:29:11 - 00:47:32:15

Speaker 1

I think I asked you in March and you said no or didn't say no. You kind of ignored me.

 

00:47:32:16 - 00:47:34:03

Speaker 2

And I kept playing hard to get.

 

00:47:34:03 - 00:47:40:15

Speaker 1

Come on. You did. You did out how to get. And I wasn't letting go, so I wasn't taking the.

 

00:47:40:15 - 00:47:44:14

Speaker 2

Kids to chase. Honey.

 

00:47:44:16 - 00:48:07:23

Speaker 1

Exactly. And so that is why we do this, though, because of these stories and what we talk about on the podcast every day. But we also talk about and the messages that we're getting from people behind the scenes thanking us for doing what we're doing. I mean, again, Brent's been doing this for the last six years, and now we're able to kind of get this message out to even a broader through this podcast word blindness.

 

00:48:07:23 - 00:48:11:00

Speaker 1

So thank you again for joining, and we will see you for the next episode.